"All my life's buried here, heap earth upon it"
That roof is calling my name.
I know it is. I can hear it.
Every day its voice gets louder and louder.
Every day I’m drawn closer and closer.
I went up there tonight.
Just to the edge. Just to look.
I held on to the safety rail.
I cannot promise that tomorrow,
I won’t let go.
I feel sick.
Constantly.
It’s like wading through a swamp. Trying to drag your limbs from quicksand. Pushing against an invisible wall, a colossal weight strapped to your back. Everything takes so much longer. So many hours are lost. Motivation is impossible to muster. Action comes only in waves. Trivial tasks are insurmountable and nothing makes sense.
I’ve become physically, mentally and emotionally immovable.
Please, send help.
