Round the Bend

Does it make me crazy,
if I turn and talk to you anyway?

Does it make me insane,
if I see you when you’re not there?

Does it make me nuts,
if I know you’re always with me?

Does it make me mad,
if I still care?

A Life Together

There were times when I would tire of it all,

But I don’t have a single regret.

I never once got bored of it all,

Our inescapable duet.

The Act

I can act like I’m happy,

I can act like I’m there.

I can act like I’m over it,

I can act like I care.

But it’s all to avoid having to admit,

That I’m just really fucking scared of life.

Without you.

Their Big Day

What am I supposed to say?

What am I supposed to do?

Everyone is happy, today.

But my heart is broken here,

without you.

Xxx

Animosity

You can
keep your
feigned apology

For your
friendship
now means
nothing to me

I shall
live without
you merrily

Waiting for
the day
everyone
will see

Just how
wicked and
cruel you
can be

Wedding Bells

Who knows
what will happen
when I get there.

Who knows
what will happen
along the way.

What I do know
is that you
won’t be there.

And my tears
will fall
all day.

Myself

Why can’t I trust myself,
like I trusted you?

Why can’t I protect myself,
like I protected you?

Why can’t I love myself,
like I loved you?

Why?

The Past

Some days
it’s easy
to remember
you

Some days
it’s hard
to forget
you

Some days
I don’t want
to remember
you

Some days
I never want
to forget
you

Recording

It’s like living
in a film
where someone else
has pressed Play.

You are
unable to Rewind
and you
cannot hit Pause.

To Fast Forward
is inconceivable
as all you want
to do is Stop.

And Eject.

Shapes

Leave
this
place
the
light
shape
whispers,
for
it
is
not
your
time.

I’m
staying
here
the
dark
shape
whispers,
for
now
I
want
what’s
mine.

Please

If this is all there is,

then who are you

to tell me no?

You have no idea,

how hard this is

so please, just let me go.

Monsters

They are always there,
Gnawing away at my brain.

One day I will kill them,
And I shall smile again.

A Thousand Years

Honestly,
I could wait
for a
thousand years
and it
would still
be too tough.

Honestly,
I could sleep
for a
thousand years
and it
would never
be enough.

Honestly,
I could cry
for a
thousand years
and it
would still
hurt too much.

Paranoia

It’s heartfelt
praise, but
I know
your ways.

How uncomfortable
you are
to see,
just how
miserable I
can be.

I’m sorry
I no
longer make
you smile.

For that
you’ll need
to wait
a while.

Until then,
just keep
telling me
I’ll make
it through.

And I’ll
keep on
whispering
fuck you.

Night Terrors (Part 1)

I sense you,
stalking me from behind.
I won’t let you win.

I see you,
prowling outside my window.
I won’t let you in.

I hear you,
scratching at my door.
I won’t let you win.

I feel you,
gnawing on my bones.
How did you get in?

Living with Hypochondria

There is something wrong with me.
I just know it.
I don't feel right.
I haven't for sometime now.
I don't know what it is.

I get headaches.
Crushing, pounding headaches.
Cannot finish cigarettes,
because of the headaches.

I'm always itching,
Skin crawling.
Can't stay in one position for too long,
as my bones ache.
Sickness burns in my stomach,
constantly queasy.
My sleep patterns are disturbed.

I have bruises on my arms and legs, 
Lumps and bumps everywhere.
I feel dizzy all the time, 
Stumbling when I walk. 
I cannot concentrate my mind.
My own wheeze wakes me up. 

There is something wrong with me.
I just know it.
I don't feel right.
I haven't for sometime now.
I don't know what it is.

But there's no way I can see a doctor.
I'm too scared for that.
They might just confirm I'm really ill,
after all...