Month: Sep 2019

?

What did I do
to deserve this?

Why did this
happen to me?

Where will
I end up now?

Who is coming
to save me?

6

Drunk

Looking in
the mirror
gives me
a fright,

But I think
I had a
good time
last night.

I don’t
remember
much or how
I got home,

Thank
fuck I’ve
woken up
alone.

9

Home Early

I
went
out
tonight

I tried
and I
failed

All
dreams
are now
curtailed

For that ship,
it seems,
has sailed

4

Misled

You say
it’s not me,
it’s you.

But
you’re
a liar.

And we
both know
that’s true.

13

Car Trouble

Nothing makes this better

Everything makes it worse

A body straining in first gear

And a mind stuck in reverse

22

Only You

With my
heart
in my
mouth

And my
head
in my
hands

It saddens
me to realise

That no one
understands

6

Mourning

Darkness
casts a
shadow
over my
head

As it
does
over
my
heart

Thoughts
and
dreams
of you
abound

As does
sorrow
that we
had to
part

11

The Washing Machine of Life

Up and down
Spinning around
No stability
to be found

Right and left
Side to side
Nowhere else
left to hide

Hang on,
where did
this sock
come from?

And where
the fuck
is the
other one?

19

Already Grown Up

Come
with me,
he said,
take my
hand.
I want to
fly you to
Neverland.

I’m sorry,
she said,
but there’s
no way
I can.
Please
say you
understand.

9

The Irritant

It actually
hurts to
listen to you

Let alone
look you
in the eye

Please just
leave me
alone

For I have
bigger fish
to fry

15

Helpline

On the
day I
summon
the courage
to call

I know
you’ll be
there to
break
my fall

0

At A Bedside, Desolate

There
is no
more
hope.

There
are no
more
dreams.

My life
continues
to fall apart
at the seams,

As I
lie here
thinking
of you.

Wondering
what the fuck
I’m supposed
to do.

Now.

1

Concequences

You said
you wanted
to leave

And I
didn’t beg
you to stay

Now we
both lie to
someone else

And that’s
the price
we pay

10

Mastermind

Please
answer
my
question

Instead
of
avoiding
it

And
try to
be
honest

Instead
of
this
bullshit

7

On This Street

One woman cries at the kitchen sink

One man pours himself another drink

One woman sits in her bedroom binge eating

One man gives another a beating

One man rocks himself to sleep

One woman prays the lord her soul to keep

One man paces going quietly mad

One woman realises she’s been had

One man cries for the loss of his wife

One woman downs pills to end her life

They all know, deep down, their lives are shit

But, on this street, they are powerless to change it

6

Under The Covers

I can be
with you,
she said,
when my
sadness no
longer shows

Then we
will go to
a place,
he said,
where no one
else knows

7

All At Sea

Abandon
hope
all ye
who enter
here

But why,
Captain,
there’s
nothing
to fear

Give
it time
for they
will
come

And I
can’t save
you from the
impending
scrum

0

Hidden

There’s
so much
of me

You
never
see

So many
things
I do

That are
hidden
from view

I know you
won’t believe
it’s true

But it’s
my way of
protecting you

16

Let

I let
myself
down
today

When I
let you
inside
my head

I wish I
could
just let
you go

And let
myself
enjoy life
instead

8

Hypothetically Speaking

Do you
ever think
of me

In those
moments
you have spare

Do you
ever
dream

Of running
your fingers
through my hair

Do you ever
imagine how
it would feel

If you
held your
hand in mine

Do you ever
long to look
into my eyes

And feel
our souls
entwine

13

Forty Winks

Why do
I bother
coming
to bed

It’s not
like I
can
sleep

All I
do is
fucking
lie here

Overthinking
and
counting
sheep

0

Conversations With Hades

Tell him
this pill is
too bitter
to swallow

Tell him
we still
have time
to borrow

Tell him
I’ll never
cope with
the sorrow

Tell him if
he takes you
to expect
me tomorrow

5

Home Alone

It’s Friday night

And I’m here alone

In this house

We used to call home

There’s nothing left now

Just an empty shell

With me here alone

Living through hell

14

Wall Art

I can’t
look at
your
photos
anymore

They make
my heart
too heavy
and my eyes
too sore

6

Double Take

It’s only
now I
realise
I’ve
played
this all
wrong

And it
actually
should
have
been
you all
along

3

The Trade Off

It is with a heavy heart

And a mournful sigh

That the time has come

To say our goodbye

I’ll always be eternally grateful

For everything you’ve done

Your love has taken away my pain

And left me with none

4

Without You

Life is
just so
shit
without
you

I’ve got
nothing
left to
hold
on to

If
only
you were
still
here

Then I’d
have
nothing
left
to fear

2

Bleak As Fuck

I
told you
a lie
yesterday

I said
I felt better
and that I
am okay

When the
actual truth
is I hope
and pray

That I
won’t live
to see
another day

18

Witchcraft

I thought
talking
would make
it easier

But if
anything
it’s made
it worse

It seems
there’s
nothing
I can do

To rid
myself
of this
curse

3

The Trouble With Juniper

Nobody
knows
the
trouble
I’ve seen

The loves
and the
losses and
everything
in-between

On one
too many
gin bottles
I have
relied

To keep
all of my
secrets
hidden
inside

3

Sunrise

I woke
up crying
again today

So much so
I struggled
to breathe

How much
longer must
I endure this?

When is
there an end
to this grief?

10

All My Fault

If there was
another way
of dealing
with this shit

I wish
now that I
could’ve
chosen it

Then I
wouldn’t have
relied so
much on you

And your
heart wouldn’t
also be torn
in two

9

You Deserve More

I wish you
could see
yourself with a
different view

And know
there are so
many things to
love about you

My only hope
is that she
will see it
again soon too

Then perhaps
you could both
just stop
making do

12

A New Dawn

Everything
changed
when I
walked out
of there

The feel of
the breeze
and the
warmth
of the air

For once
in my life
I just
stopped
fighting

And I
suddenly
found life
much more
inviting

9

Done

Fuck you,

And your pathetic little smile.

Fuck you,

And your poisonous bile.

Fuck you,

And your disingenuous chatter.

Fuck you,

For you no longer matter.

At all,

To me.

7

A Solo Affair

I’m fine
by myself
without
all of
that

Just me
here
alone
in my
own flat

I don’t
need to
feel anyone
else’s
touch

As frankly
I never
really
liked it
much

0

Killing Time

Why do I
find the
wait so
hard?

Is it
ego?

Is it
pride?

Or is it
because
I need you
to prove

That I’m not
completely
dead
inside?

2

That Split Second

When I saw you
sleeping there

I couldn’t help
but stop and stare

Probably because
I was drunk too

Although nowhere
near as drunk as you

I had to walk over
and poke the bear

4

A Risky Business

We really
shouldn’t
do this,
she said,
it’s not
the right
time

It’s now
or never,
he said,
for I’ll
soon be
past my
prime

0

Run Like The Wind

After
every
high

There is
the inevitable
low

And she’s coming
for me again,
I know

I feel her
getting closer
and closer each day

And this time
she’s going
to make me pay

2

Angels & Devils

Good men
do bad things

And good
women do too

If I was ever that way
inclined again

I’d do bad things
with you

4

The Truth

If you
knew
the
truth
about me

You
would
run
away
and hide

You
wouldn’t
waste
another
minute

On
someone
so
rotten
inside

2

Happy

I
miss
you,

I
miss
us,

I wish we
could just
go back,

To
how it
was

Before
all
of this.

Before
things turned
to shit

And we
were
happy.

Because
we were
happy.

I
was
happy.

Wasn’t I?

4

Vicious Cycle

I’ll be here
to catch you
when you fall

And I’ll be here
to push you
back down too

Trapped in
our own
vicious cycle

Stuck together,
forever,
like glue

4

Once In A Lifetime

I’m
scared
that
the
spell
is
now
broken
and
our
future
conversations
will
just
become
a
token
not
only
of the
connection
we once
shared
but
also
of
the
souls
that
we
once
bared

3

(In) Tense

If only you would
If only you wouldn’t

If only you could
If only you couldn’t

If only I did
If only I didn’t

If only I had
If only I hadn’t

9

Trip Wires

If
love is
not what
you say

But
what
you do
instead

Then
you’ve
fucked
up

On
both
counts
mate

So be
careful
where you
tread

11

When Lightning Strikes

It’s like
we’ve been
connected
forever,
he said,
but it’s only
been a minute

However long
it’s been,
she said,
I can’t
remember a
life without
you in it

0

Yes Sir, No Sir

Okay,
okay,
I accept
defeat.

I’ll get up,
get dressed,
drink tea,
eat.

I’ll take
the pills
you say
I need.

I’ll be a
good girl
like we
agreed.

9

I Can’t Tell You

I can’t
tell
you
how
much
better
I feel

To
know my
feelings
I need
no
longer
conceal

I
can’t
tell you
how much
more open
I am
now

To the
possibility
of loving
someone
again,
someday,
somehow

7

I’m Sorry

It hurt
to see
the pain
in your
eyes

I felt
every
ache
of your
heart

If only
I could
ease the
anguish
you feel

But
I have
no wisdom
left to
impart

10

The Settlement

I only want
what’s best
for you,
he said,
even if it’s
not what’s
best for me

I just
want this
to end,
she said,
I simply
want to
be free

10

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