Category: Coping

2pm: CBT

Fiona

Finds the biscuits

As Paula

Pours the tea

Stuart

Starts the talking

While Luke laughs

Affectedly

As I sit here

And listen

It all becomes 

Abundantly clear

So I relax, safe,

In the knowledge

I’m not the only

Fuck up here

6

Fuck My Life

I told myself

I wouldn’t do this again

I’d never put myself

Through all this pain

Yet here I am

Overthinking

It’s no fucking wonder

I feel like drinking

I really should

Have learned by now

No good ever comes

From such nagging self doubt

Now I can but hope

That my brain shuts down

While I circle the drain

And get ready to drown

2

Volumes

There’s nobody to wake me

Or offer me a drink

No one here to greet me

Or ask me what I think

I always thought I’d be happy

If I was on my own

But I’d never considered

How I’d become so withered

From the silence of being alone

0

For Your Eyes Only

I read those letters

Yesterday

The ones I sent

To push you away

And yet you stayed

Seeing through my plan

And that is why

You’re my favourite man

0

Calling In Sane*

Why do we even bother

She said

When it’s such a fucking farce

It really makes you wonder

She said

How anyone can be arsed

*title courtesy of Philip Brent Harris at thepensmight.com

2

Boring

If we ever

Met again

I’d explain why

I walked away

It wasn’t that

I didn’t want to chat

But I simply

Had nothing to say

2

Dead Cert

You’re a gambling man

She said

What odds would you give me?

On you seeing it though

He said

I’d give you 2 to 3

0

A Fate Worse Than Death

I will always say

That I’m doing well

And that nothing

Could ever annoy me

Because if I didn’t

That look

On your face

Would absolutely destroy me

4

Hitting Back

What you said

That day

Hurt me

How you treated me

Was wrong

So I’ll make sure

You get yours

To rapturous applause

Before

Too fucking long

0

Spilled Guts

If only you knew

You’re heaven sent

How you just listening

Helps me to vent

But you never will

‘Cause I’ll never say

As I wouldn’t risk

You walking away

0

You Never Listen Anyway

I’m starting to think

It’s time

For someone else

To help you instead

You’re far too reliant

And much too incompliant

For me

To sort out your head

0

Entering The Stream

A simple girl

With simple needs

Willing to wander

Through the weeds

Searching for something

True to find

While leaving all

Her doubts behind

5

That’s Life

Wearing away

My heart and soul

Destroying me was

Your only goal

So with your daggers

You proceeded

Until I was broken

And you’d succeeded

2

I Didn’t Believe You Anyway

Remember

When you told me

I’d never get hurt again

That it didn’t matter

How my heart was shattered

As there wouldn’t be

Any more pain

Well, you lied

This is worse

0

Self Preservation

Stop giving

It all away

And save some

For yourself

If you carry on

It’ll all be gone

And you’ll destroy

Your mental health

0

Lesson Learned

Every time

I tried to speak

I realised

I couldn’t

Because

Every time

I opened up

You’d show me why

I shouldn’t

0

Ghosts Of The Past

I think it’s unfair

To suggest

I use my childhood

As a shield

When, in fact,

It’s the way they act

That makes me

Unwilling

To yield

0

Beautifully Ruined

For the first time

In a long time

I felt myself

Today

Full of lumps

Bruises and bumps

Yet I still took

My own breath away

2

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