Random #253

“What you really want is someone you can hang around with on a Sunday afternoon and watch a TV show with, and do nothing, and feel like it’s the most fun ever.”

– Aziz Ansari

2

Old Movies (2)

“Of all the gin joints
In all the world…
She walks into mine”

“I hope he doesn’t think
I came here for him
As I just fancied
A soda and lime”

Old Movies (1)

Come
death
come,
as fast
as you
can

As
frankly
my dear,
I don’t
give
a damn

(Originally Posted 04.11.2019)

6

Vanilla

After all

That playful promise

It is time for me

To be brutally honest

I’m glad we tried it

In the sack

But I’m leaving now

And I won’t be back

Closing Time

If a
nod

Is as
good

As a
wink

Then
me
and
you

Should
get
that
drink

And
finally
put

This
flirtatious
thing

Between
us
both

To
bed

(Originally Posted 04.11.2020)

3

An Unscalable Fence

After all that you

Put me through

You think a sorry will suffice

You’ve got no clue

Of what you’d need to do

For me to even think about playing nice

There’s No Excuse

It
didn’t
mean
a thing
back
then

And
it
certainly
doesn’t
now

So
you can
shove
your
apology

Up
your
arse

You
spiteful
little
cow

(Originally Posted 03/11/2020)

2

The Split

This is what, ultimately,

Was the cause of it all

When he’d reached the end

And I needed a friend

It wasn’t her I wanted to call

Not Everybody Hurts The Same

Privacy
is not
allowed,
it seems

When
you’re
trying
to grieve

People
get pissed
off,
it seems

If you don’t
wear your
heart on
your sleeve

(Originally Posted 03.11.2019)

4

Artificial Intelligence

If only we

Were like machines

Coded in black and white

We would be

Safe in our routines

And sleep far better at night

Outbid

Don’t
give
up,

The
email
reads,

You can
still get
what you
want.

Only an
automated
response,

I
believe,

Could
be so
nonchalant

(Originally Posted 02.11.2019)

2

Imploded

Concerning affairs

Of the heart

I was once a master

But when he died

I lost my mind

And now I’m a complete disaster

Ready To Implode

It
isn’t
you

That
I don’t
trust

Honestly,
it’s
me

My
mind
is

No
longer
robust
enough

To
deal
with

Such
trickery

(Originally Posted 02.11.2019)

2

Ticking All The Boxes

It was right, I think, to call it a day

As were hardly

Love’s young dream

I mean you put in the graft

And it did make me laugh

But you’d never have made me scream

Dirty Minds

As you don’t seem

To get it

I’ll explain it again

Real quick

It wasn’t your love

I wanted

It was merely your…

Conversation

(Originally Posted 01.11.2021)

9

An Official Declaration

I guess I don’t feel

Like this anymore

But in that I can take no pride

As the only reason

I feel any different

Is because I’m now dead inside

What’s The Point?

It
feels
like
I will
never
laugh
again

As my
life
is so
full of
sorrow
and pain

Like
I will
no
longer
be able
to smile

And
that
nothing
I do will
ever be
worthwhile

(Originally Posted 01.11.2019)

8

Cringing

When I read back

On posts like this

I can’t help but curl my toes

It’s like I think

You’re all in the pink

And it’s just me that feels morose

In My Shoes

Bitter
and
twisted

Yes,
that’s
me

But
live
my
life

For a
minute
or two

And so
would
you
fucking
be

(Originally Posted 01.11.2020)

4

Back From The Dead #3

As I lie here lamenting
My own demise
Please enjoy
This Halloween reprise
🎃

Body Snatchers

Far more terrifying

Than any soul left behind

Are the ghouls

Who camp out permanently

In the corners of my mind

(Originally Posted 31.10.2021)

4

Back From The Dead #2

As I lie here lamenting
My own demise
Please enjoy
This Halloween reprise
🎃

The Scottish Lair

Six
feet
under

All dark
and
gloomy

When
a small
voice
whispers

‘Welcome roomie…’

(Originally Posted 31.10.2020)

2

Back From The Dead #1

As I lie here lamenting
My own demise
Please enjoy
This Halloween reprise
🎃

Portent

There is no reprieve

For those who venture outside

As on All Hallows’ Eve

There’s nowhere to hide

(Originally Posted 31.10.2019)

8

What’s Next?

Four different medications

Plus some of my own to boot

Yet the madness persists

As I eye up my wrists

Making the point of treatment moot

Assistance / Resistance

So
it’s
been
a year

Of
your
latest
treatment

Yet
I still
don’t
feel

Any
fucking
different

(Originally Posted 30.10.2020)

2

Accepting What I Cannot Change

If you’re talking about my arms

She said

Then the urge I could try to park

But if you mean my wit

She said

That’ll always be razor sharp

Spitting Distance

We
could
have
had
it
all

She
said

But
now
we’re
left
with
nothing

Maybe
we’d
have
been
okay

He
said

Had you
not been
so fucking
cutting

(Originally Posted 30.10.2020)

0

Pulling Myself Together

It would not be

That unusual for me

To view my own mental health

As simply cliché

And to explain it away

As just feeling sorry for myself

The Gloom

Does it
follow me

Or do I
chase it

Either way
around

It’s still
pretty shit

(Originally Posted 30.10.2019)

8

Birthdays & Christmases

It’s alright for you

As all you need to do

Is remember him

On special occasions

Well I feel that way

Every fucking day

So you’ll never know

My frustrations

Clueless

You
think
you
know

But
you
have
no clue

What
I’ve
had to
let go

Or
what I
still go
through

(Originally Posted 30.10.2019)

0

Before It’s Too Late

Check in with your family and friends

Make sure they know you are their ally

As you can’t always tell

Who on the outside looks well

But on the inside wants to die

The Passing Samaritan

I
really
can’t
explain
it

This
feeling
I have
inside

I
just
don’t
want
to be
here

And,
God
knows,
I’ve
tried

(Originally Posted 29.10.2020)

8

Plagiarism Begins At Home

This is an interpolation

Or is it just out and out theft

Either way we know

Without the modifications below

That my lines would be bereft

Something Old / Something New

I wandered lonely as a cloud

Screaming the words fuck you out loud

As, like the night, she walked in beauty

I wished someone would just come along and shoot me

As I, in the wood, took the road less travelled

I sat and cried as my mind unravelled

And as we talked between the rooms

I closed my eyes and succumbed to the fumes

(Originally Posted 29.10.2019)

6

Random #251

“and we didn’t love each other
but we helped each other forget
that life is shit”

– Sean Hughes

0

How Much Longer?

Three years on

And here I am

Having been kept waiting

With my life on hold

My heart stone cold

And my tears still accumulating

Tell Me

Do
these
tears
ever
stop?

(Originally Posted 28.10.2019)

8

In Essence

If anyone asked

About my rhymes

I would most likely show them this

It’s an apt expression

Of my abject depression

And defines my blog’s premise

Innards

Like a
bird

Trapped
in it’s
cage

I sing
of love
and
lament

Bleeding
both

Introspective
rage

And
embittered
discontent

(Originally Posted 28.10.2020)

10

I Should’ve Known Better

It isn’t that you lied,

It’s that I believed you.

That’s what hurts.

Support

I really
cannot
stay,
she said,
it is time
for me
to go
back

It’s the
only way,
she said,
to get
my life
on track

I will come
with you,
he said,
you needn’t
be on
your own

I’m here to
help you
through,
he said,
so you’ll
never
be alone

(Originally Posted 28.10.2019)

0

Hot And Bothered

I reckon I could melt it

He said

Just by using my hands for warmth

I’m pretty sure at this point

She said

You’d need at least a fucking blowtorch

The Ice Queen

One
touch

Is
not
enough

I’ll
need
much
more

For
my
heart
to
thaw

(Originally Posted 27.10.2019)

0

Chance Would Be A Fine Thing

I sound like such a strumpet

In some of these lines I write

But I can promise you

The actual truth

Is that I am alone most nights

Rolling In The Hay

Looking
up at
you

Looking
down
at me

I know
this is
where

We’re
supposed
to be

(Originally Posted 27.10.2019)

6

Deleted

You lost the rights

Of a confidente

When you sold me down the river

Content to stare

Without a care

As I stood there and shivered

So I’ll never again

Confide in you

On that I will deliver

For all my trust

Has turned to dust

As our friendship has now withered

On Silent

Don’t
bother to
phone me

As I’ll
just watch
it ring

I will not
answer
to you

Or
tell you
anything

(Originally Posted 26.10.2019)

0

The Dance

Another well meaning question

Asked way too expectantly

Answered without hesitation

Although far too respectfully

Tight Lipped

I am
not
trying
to be
mean

Or to
cause
yet
another
scene

So before
my fuse
is well
and truly
blown

Please
just piss
off and
leave me
alone

(Originally Posted 26.10.2019)

0

I’d Never See You Again

If I revealed

The truth about me

It would shatter the illusion

Now, I know you’d say

You wouldn’t care anyway

But I couldn’t deal with the conclusion

For Our Own Good

You never
see the
worst of
my illness
because
I hide it
from you

For you
to know
the truth
about me
would
completely
tear me
in two

So I’ll
paint
on a
smile and
pretend
that I’m
fine

For
doing so
protects
both
your
sanity
and mine

(Originally Posted 25.10.2019)

0

Birds Of A Feather

It still amazes me

To this day

That you even read my rhymes

Don’t get me wrong, my friend

It pleases me no end

But I do worry about you, at times

Wonderland

It’s nice
to think
I matter

That what
I feel is
shared

But really
I’m as mad
as a hatter

Surely no one
else is this
impaired?

(Originally Posted 25.10.2019)

4

Stuck On Repeat

I must be one of those people

Who really gets off on pain

As since he died

On this song I’ve imbibed

Again and again and again

Masochism

Every time
I hear
this song

It brings
tears to
my eyes

And pain
to my
heart

A reminder of
all I’ve come
to despise

And how
we’ll forever
be apart

I should
just press
stop

Switch
off the
laptop

And
walk
away…

(Originally Posted 24.10.2019)

0

Rituals

I’ve picked up a few

Tips and tricks

Over the years

That I’ve been hurting

And although some work

My demons still lurk

So I’m never too far away

From reverting

Harm Reduction

I’ve been
trying
so hard
to break
this chain

So I’ve
drawn on
my arms
with Biro
again

At least,
this time,
it’s just
a token

And my
skin,
for now,
remains
unbroken

(Originally Posted 24.10.2019)

2

Lowering Expectations

I’ve felt this way

For some time now

And yet I still plod on

Perhaps this is just

My normal now

And it’s hoping for more that’s wrong

Zestless

Finally
dropping
into
bed

Knowing
I couldn’t
have done
any more

There is
no point
in setting
an alarm

As
there’s
nothing
to wake
up for

(Originally Posted 24.10.2020)

4

Always Read The Fine Print

When he said I had three wishes

I thought I’d won the lottery

That he would now provide my chance

To finally be free

If only I had known then

Exactly what would come to be

As all those wishes bought about

Was pain and misery

The Lamp

I should
have been
more careful

With what
it was that
I wished
for

Because
I never
wanted it
to end

In this
way
at all

(Originally Posted 23.10.2019)

2

Nobody Is Safe

No one could ever accuse me

Of division or discrimination

For I can pour my vitriol

Without any kind of limitation

Fact

Oh,
I don’t
just hate
you

I
hate
everyone

(Originally Posted 23.10.2019)

4

Behind Enemy Lines

If only I’d tried harder

I could have fought you more

If only I’d been smarter

I could have won the war

Fade To Black

Pull down the stars

Put out the sun

I’ve had enough

You have won

(Originally Posted 23.10.2020)

0

Bait

It was never

Going to be you

Not that I

Would’ve wanted to

It was always just

You reminded me

That there would be other

Fish in the sea

Indebted

Thank
you so
much
for
being
you

Otherwise
I’d still
be wandering
around
without
a clue

Waiting
for
the days
not to
feel
so blue

And
hoping
to find
a love
that’s
true

(Originally Posted 22.10.2019)

0

Nothing Left To Say

I am pretty sure

I’ll give up soon

When I find a moment

That is opportune

I’ll say goodbye

Just after nightfall

And put down my pen

Once and for all

Done In

There’s
only so
much I
can write

Before
I go
to sleep
tonight

My
eyes are
heavy and
overtired

My
heart is
weary and
overfired

(Originally Posted 22.10.2019)

14

Random #249

“People think that I’m sort of okay, you know, like I’m getting on with it. I’m snarky now and again and that this is the lapse – but it’s not. This is me all the time now.

Everything else is the fun, you know.

I’m not well, but I remember what it was like to be normal so I do an impression of that. But this is what I really am. And I want to be normal again. But I’m weak, you know.”

– Tony

2

Tea, Milady?

You will feel much better

She said

After a drink and something to eat

There’s no point in feeding me up

She said

For I have accepted defeat

Little Miss Pitiful

Too busy to stop,

Too bored to stay.

Too broken to fight,

For yet another day.

(Originally Posted 21.10.2019)

2

The Callbacks

You there

Number two

You look like

You might do

And you standing

At the back

It seems like you

Could be good craic

I’ll also have you

Number seven

With your cheekbones

Straight from heaven

And lastly you

Against the door

I feel you could offer

Me a little more

So all of you please

Step to my boudoir

And we’ll see who gets

To baise moi, ce soir

The Auditions

One step

Two step

Three step

Four

Just

Keep

Walking

Towards

The

Door

Five step

Six step

Seven step

Eight

You

Could

Never

Be

My

Soul

Mate

(Originally Posted 21.10.2020)

4

Thank Fuck It’s Friday

With all these plates

To keep on spinning

It’s no wonder that I

Never feel like I’m winning

Mondays

Head racing
a million
miles an hour

Heart
pounding
the same

So many
appointments
to make

So many
lions
to tame

(Originally Posted 21.10.2019)

2

Measure For Measure

You’ve already kissed the Blarney Stone

She said

So let’s just call it a night

You’ve necked just as much as me

He said

And spoken as much shite!!

The Other Irish Rover

I’m
sorry
I told
you
I love
you

He
said

I
just
did it
for
the
craic

There’s
no
need to
apologise

She
said

Just
don’t
expect
I’ll
say it
back

(Originally Posted 20.10.2020)

6

Left Traumatised

Not a method I would choose

In reality

As I’d care about the driver

Far more than I ever could me

The Railway Line

I
shouldn’t
need to
tell you
again

You
must
already
know

I
don’t
want to
be here
anymore

Please
just
let me
go

(Originally Posted 20.10.2020)

6

All Those Little Things

All those little things

That you think matter

Mean literally nothing

When your heart is shattered

Flowers

You never
once
bought
me flowers

Which used
to make
me mad

Now I don’t
give a fuck
about any
of that stuff

I just
want you
back

(Originally Posted 20.10.2019)

0

The Perfect Cruise

Not the North Sea, mind

It’s far too fucking cold

Somewhere in the Med, perhaps

Underneath a sky of gold

Landlocked

If only
we could
just drift
away
to sea

Instead
of being
trapped
here in
misery

(Originally Posted 19.10.2019)

0

Coquette

Our plan was hatched

And opportunity set

But then you went and spoiled it

By playing hard to get

Clandestine

Let’s
meet
up

And
misbehave

Then
take
our
secrets

To the
grave

(Originally Posted 19.10.2020)

0

Pot-Valiant

2,995 posts

And one pickled liver later

It’s a good job

That I didn’t stop

Or I’d never have put pen to paper

Drinking

I fear
I’ve had
one too
many
tonight

Perhaps
now isn’t
the time
my story
to write

(Originally Posted 18.10.2019)

9

Taking A Telling

Over one thousand lifetimes

My answer would always be no

For it doesn’t matter

How much you flatter

I’d never again stoop so low

The Hopeless Romantic

You’ll
never
be the
one for
me,

So why
can’t I
just
leave
it alone?

Why do
I keep
getting
my hopes
up,

When
you’ve
made your
feelings
known

(Originally Posted 18.10.2019)

2

Toxic Bitch

She’s still out there

Or so I’ve heard

Badmouthing me

To her adoring herd

Never recounting her part

In what happened with us

Preferring, as ever, to throw me

Under the bus

Bitter

Tell all
the lies
about me
you like

Spin your
twisted
tales
of spite

But half
truths won’t
make people
like you

And they
certainly
don’t make
you right

(Originally Posted 18.10.2019)

2

When They All Go Home

If you’ve ever planned a funeral

Then I’m sure you’ll relate to this

It’s easy not to crack

When focused on the task

But when it’s done, you fall to shit

Keeping Busy

It’s been
a busy
few days

In
many
ways

But now all
my tasks are
completed

So with
nothing
left to do

I’ll soon
be thinking
of you

And how
I’ve been left
feeling cheated

(Originally Posted 17.10.2019)

4

Not Yet, Anyway

It will soon be three years

Without him here

And I know time is supposed to fly

But it feels like just yesterday

That he was my mainstay

So I’m not ready for some other guy

The Anniversary

It will
soon be
a year,
without
you here,
and I
don’t
know
what
to do.

For I’m
still
nowhere
near,
facing
my fear,
or the
reality
of losing
you.

Xxx

(Originally Posted 17.10.2019)

4

Flawed

You all make it look easy

So I thought I’d give it a go

But what you get on a plate

I can’t replicate

So at least now, I know

Undeserving

I’ll
never
fall
in love
again

Not
that
I ever
wanted
to be

Love is
for those
with
delicate
souls

And
not
for the
likes
of me

(Originally Posted 17.10.2019)

4

Trouble And Strife

I will quite happily sit here

Enjoying all this food and wine

But you should remember

That come next November

The last laugh will be mine

A Waste Of Money

Dearly
beloved

We
are
gathered
here
today

To
witness
this
couple’s
happiness

We
must
remember,
of course,

That
in a
year
they’ll
divorce

And
we’ll
have
forgotten
all of this
sappiness

(Originally Posted 16.10.2020)

2

La Belle Dame Sans Merci

Please don’t think me arrogant,

Inconsiderate or unkind

It’s just that if I must

Towards another man be thrust

Then I think I’ll lose my mind

Twinkle

You
say
that
look
in my
eye

Sends
shivers
down
your
spine

I hope
one day,
when
you
look
at me,

That
you’ll
send
shivers
down
mine

(Originally Posted 16.10.2019)

0

‘Your Face Is As Mean As Your Life Has Been…’

Nothing can ever take away

These songs that saved my life

But watching you now

Though you can still wow

That tie really is a crime!

‘Handsome Devil’

There
once
was a
light

That
shone
in my
life

But
now it’s
sadly
gone out

For
I have
since
found

Heroes
let
you
down

Of that
there
can be
doubt

(Originally Posted 16.10.2019)

0

Spilt Milk

There’s no use in trying

To understand

As it makes no difference

We may as well take complying

By the hand

And hope for deliverence

The Fall

I am
unsure
how it
happened

And I
certainly
don’t
know why

So there’s
nothing left,
for me to
do now

But
just sit
around
and cry

(Originally Posted 15.10.2019)

0

Bragging Rights

Well, I’m
proud
to have
you

On
my
arm

And
it’ll
remain
that way

It’s
not my
fault

That
he fell
short

And
let you
walk
away

Public Displays of Affection

It’s a
jarring
thought

For us
to be
caught

Holding
hands with
each other

I’d be
terribly
fraught

To think
of him
distraught

That I was
now in love
with another

(Originally Posted 15.10.2019)

2

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