Still Standing

I haven’t

Really done much

In my forty six years

On Earth

There’s nothing of note

To really show off

That has any value

Or worth

But one thing

I am proud of

If you can excuse

My indulgence

Is I’ve survived the days

When, deep in a haze,

I really thought

I fucking wouldn’t

8

Canto 38

You may say

It’s better

To have loved

And lost

Than never to

Have loved

At all

But if what happened 

To me

Happened

To you

You wouldn’t have

The fucking gall

2

Easy Meat

My brain

Will not stop circling

Like a vulture

Overhead

I can feel it

Fucking worsening

So I may as well

Just play dead

0

Rewinding The Film

I don’t know

If I lost you

Or if

You were never

Really mine

Either way

You’re gone

So I’ll keep

Moving on

And maybe 

Figure it out

In time

0

The Helpline Shift

If only

I could help you

I’d be there

In a minute

But since he’s gone

My reserves are done

And my heart

Is no longer in it

0

With The Fishes

Grief

Is like

An ocean

All vast,

And dark,

And deep

It ebbs

And flows

In waves

Through

Dark nights

And days

Never truly

Going

To sleep

4

Just For Fun

Why don’t we

Just hit rewind

Go back to another

Place and time

Relive the day

That we first met

And when we didn’t

Hate each other yet

0

The Parish Notice

Whatever

You’re running

Away from

There is no

Salvation

Here

All you will find

Is what you left

Behind

Still comes through

Loud

And clear

0

A More Accurate Verse

What happened to

“I’ll make you happy baby,

Just wait and see”

It’s been more like

“Give me an inch baby,

And I’ll take fucking three”

2

The Sum Of All Parts

I know

That I was lucky

To get

The prettiest

Of heads

But I would’ve

Preferred

To have been

A nerd

And been born

With brains

Instead

9

Bitter Clarity

Searching

For the answers

Trying to make it

All make sense

But there’s no peace

Of mind

When all you

Can find

Is the lack

Of recompense

5

Don’t Come Crying To Me

I’m sorry

To have to say it

But I don’t think

About you

Anymore

And if that sounds

Unkind

I can, once again,

Outline

How it was you

Who closed

That door

2

Everything After

Life does go on,

You know

But you’re never

Really

The same

You just

Get good

At doing what

You should

So you can keep on

Playing

The game

2

Second Prize

I guess you were feeling lonely

Or particularly sad that day

As they are the only two reasons

You would look at me that way

4

Were We Ever Us?

Sometimes I wonder

Was it really true

Did you actually love me

As much as I loved you

Because now,

It seems,

Whenever I think back

I don’t remember the good

And can only see

The cracks

Xxx

0

Of Pensionable Age

If I was ten years younger

He said

Then I’d certainly be more bold

If you were ten years younger

She said

Then you’d still be way too old

6

Make It Make Sense

God knows

What I did

In a past life

Or who sewed

These seeds

I reap

As I can fall

In love

Easily enough

But never 

To fucking sleep

0

Oh, The Irony

Don’t fall for it

Smiled The Charmer

It’s always me

I am the drama

“Infamy, infamy, they’ve all got it in for me…”

– Kenneth Williams (as Julius Caesar)

0

To Be Clear

You don’t have

To see it

My way

There’s no need

For you

To agree

But I’ve thought

It over

And for the sake

Of closure

I’m pretty sure

That it wasn’t me

0

Thanks For That

What is the fucking point

She said

Now I’m knee deep in it?

Trying to put

My best foot forward

And wade through this sea of shit

Don’t ask me

He said

2

In The Trance Tent

Although

I had

A really

Good time

And never once

Felt on

My own

It seems

Despite

Dancing with

A sea of people

I’m still destined

To go home

Alone

4

Good Morning

Monday morning

Same old story

Trying to pretend

I’m hunky dory

If only weekends

Lasted longer

Maybe I’d start the week

Feeling stronger

But as it stands

I never feel refreshed

So how this week will go

Is anyone’s guess

2

After The Funeral

Walking home

In the rain

Knowing I’ll never

See you again

My heart hangs heavy

My eyes shut tight

Knowing there’s no way

That I’ll last the night

4

Post Gym Workout

Don’t think

I’ll let you

Just lie there

All backwards cap

And grey

Sweatpants

For we both

Know when

I count

To ten

You won’t stand

Even half

A chance

0

Gut Punch

Just as you

Start to think

You can cope

With anything

It comes along

To prove you wrong

And you’re left,

Reeling

0

Drained

I wouldn’t have

Invited you

If I didn’t want

You to come

Plus, I can’t go home

On my own

As my batteries

Are done

5

Fucking Humiliating

I am truly sorry

He said

I never meant

To break your heart

Maybe it would’ve been better

She said

To have been honest

From the start

2

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