"All my life's buried here, heap earth upon it"
Now you’re not here
To cheer me on
I have lost my way a bit
I just need to remember
Those things you said
And try my best to get through it
You Make It Easy
It’s
not
really
you I
love
It’s
that
when
I am
with
you
You
make
it
easy
to
believe
The
lies
I tell
myself
are
true
(Originally Posted 08.05.2020)
I haven’t had this dream
For a while now
But I know that I am not free
For to be confined
By what’s inside my mind
Will be my destiny
Night Terrors (Part 1)
I sense you,
stalking me from behind.
I won’t let you win.
I see you,
prowling outside my window.
I won’t let you in.
I hear you,
scratching at my door.
I won’t let you win.
I feel you,
gnawing on my bones.
How did you get in?
(Originally Posted 08.05.2019)
Someone asked me
The other day
How it was that we met
It felt so easy
In a strange way
To recite our own vignette
Cambuslang
All
those
days we
stayed
in bed
They
rattle
around
inside
my head
Until
the tears
run from
my eyes
As the
love we
shared
slowly
dies
Xxx
(Originally Posted 07.05.2020)
‘This is not really
This, this, this is not really happening
You bet your life it is…’
‘There ain’t nothing in the woodshed
(except maybe some wood)’
“There must have been a moment at the beginning, where we could have said no. Somehow we missed it. Well, we’ll know better next time.”
– Guildenstern
I threw out that rope
A few weeks ago
When I cleared out the shed
Now I’ll try to forgo
My life of woe
And hope for better instead
K(not)
All
I can
say is
I live
in hope
That
one day
I will
tie that
rope
As
tightly
as I see
it in
my mind
And
all my
troubles
I’ll leave
behind
(Originally Posted 06.05.2020)
Because your love was strong
He said
You can feel like that again
I’m afraid this time you’re wrong
She said
You’re talking bullshit, friend
Conversations with Idiots
‘It’s better
to have
loved and lost
than never to
have loved
at all’
‘You really
should just
shut your mouth
as, honestly,
you know
fuck all’
(Originally Posted 06.05.2019)
You hide behind
All that shit you post
But you and I both know
You’re far more inclined
Someone else to quote
Than for your own thoughts to show
Blocked
Your
platitudes
irritate
me every
day
That’s
it
That’s
all
I wanted
to
say
(Originally Posted 05.05.2020)
Please don’t misunderstand me
I didn’t mean this physically
It was far more metaphorically
That I didn’t want you near me
Distance
The closer
you get,
I wish
you were
further away.
(Originally Posted 05.05.2019)
So I suppose
This is the part
Where you say hello
And break my heart
All Good Things
So
I
suppose
This
is the
part
Where
you say
goodbye
And
break my
heart
(Originally Posted 04.05.2020)
Call me pessimistic
But I’m just being real
This isn’t just
What I think
This is exactly how I feel
Cruelty
In a perfect world,
There is someone for everyone.
You meet each other.
You fall in love.
And you stay together,
Forever.
Ours, however, is a cruel world.
There is someone for everyone,
But you might never meet them.
You might never fall in love.
And you might not stay together,
Forever.
Because they might die,
Before you do.
And then, you’re fucked.
(Originally Posted 03.05.2019)
You never got why
I did what I did
Even now, you couldn’t recall
But I know why
I did what I did
And I don’t regret it, at all
Mine
I don’t want to ‘talk’ about it.
I don’t want to ‘express’ it.
I don’t want to ‘let it out’.
I want to keep this part for me.
A part that’s private.
A part that’s mine and mine alone.
As it should be.
I didn’t share my love and I refuse to share my grief.
So just piss off, the lot of you.
(Originally Posted 03.05.2019)
Reckon I must have been watching
That show again when I wrote this
As the only threat I’m capable of giving
Is one of a Glasgow kiss
Omerta
Please
stop
your
incessant
noise
Or I’ll
send
round
one of
the boys
(Originally Posted 02.05.2020)
As if all I do
Is wander around
And weep into the rain
When I really feel blue
To my bed I am bound
As that is my real domain
Grey Days
I love
walking
on grey days
The raindrops
land on my face
and mingle with
my tears
Hiding them
from prying
eyes
(Originally Posted 02.05.2019)
I have been here
Just over three years
With 2,500 posts to boot
So if you still don’t know
To expect a shit show
Then there’s nothing else I can do
Brutal Is My Middle Name
And honest
Is my first
Do not bother
Reading on
Without expecting
The worst
(Originally Posted 01.05.2020)
I’ve said this many times
Mainly to my psychiatrist
For it is he who,
In my opinion,
Sould remain the quietest
No Idea
Stop asking me questions
When you are in no way prepared for the answers
(Originally Posted 01.05.2019)
I can’t quite believe
All the time I wasted
Trying to be perfect
When all I created
Was a lie
Bruised
It’s
OK
You
can
say
it
After
all
it’s
true
I
know
you
never
Really
loved
me
Like
how
I loved
you
(Originally Posted 30.04.2020)
That is the difference
Between you and me
I have no interest
In all of this
Whilst you are happy to be
The Silent Killer
I’m just sitting here,
Waiting it out,
Biding my time.
Soon,
The axe will fall.
And it’ll all be over.
Thankfully.
(Originally Posted 30.04.2019)
‘I don’t keep my secrets there
I hide them everywhere…’
“You’d be surprised what lengths people will go to not to face what’s real and painful inside them.”
– Kester Gill
If I ever write
A book on grief
This will be
The only page
Grief 101
Just smile and nod
Even if what they say
Makes no fucking sense.
It’s better to be polite,
After all,
Than to punch people
In the face.
(Originally Posted 29.04.2019)
If only you knew
All the shit I was buying
Just to see you
On my doorstep smiling
I’d be off your route
Immediately
The Delivery Man
You have no idea,
How much your sideways glance,
Hauls my weary heart,
Through yet another,
Lonely day…
(Originally Posted 29.04.2019)
I don’t remember where this was
Or which comedian I was bashing
But I hope they could see
It wasn’t them, but me
That was the reason I wasn’t laughing
Row 3 Seat 5
I don’t know
who said you
were funny
But I think
you’re pretty
witless
This really
wasn’t worth
the money
As I’m sitting
here bored
shitless
(Originally Posted 29.04.2020)
It’ll be you next
When the music stops
So I’ll look away
As your heart drops
An Unwanted Gift
You’ll always carry it with you,
the pain.
You can try to wrap it differently.
Use an alternative box,
choose a shiny wrapping paper.
Secure it with ribbon,
Even glue on a fucking huge bow,
if you like.
But you’ll still carry it with you,
the pain.
Like a gaudy present nobody wants to open.
An unwanted gift you can never return.
(Originally Posted 28.04.2019)
There is a fine line
She said
Between charm and bullshit
Get me another beer
She said
And we’ll see if you can find it
The Mutual Appreciation Society
Pour
yourself
a drink
And come
sit with me
Let’s tell
each other
stories
Of how we’re
meant to be
(Originally Posted 28.04.2020)
Was it real
Was it true?
Or was it just
My version of you?
Ambiguity
Is
it
real
What
you
see?
Or
is it
just
Your
version
of me?
(Originally Posted 27.04.2020)
Upon my skin
Those scars abound
A better release
I’ve never found
Precision
Just be
careful
not to
slip
Not one
ounce of
blood to
drip
For you
do not want
them to
see
Just how
messed
up you
can be
(Originally Posted 27.04.2020)
I tried to forgive you
Once
But I didn’t quite succeed
So I tried to forget you
Twice
But I would never be freed
Promises
I promise myself
never again
every time
and every time
I believe it.
But the truth is
forgetting you is
a promise
I am powerless
to keep.
(Originally Posted 27.04.2019)
Yet the fantasy
That promises so much
Rarely delivers
In the end
IPA
Beer
Bridging the great divide
between dreams and reality
Since 1993
(Originally Posted 26.04.2019)
You have it all
In comparison to me
This has always been true
It’s why I’ll never be
Anything more
Than infinitely jealous of you
Lucky You
My head hurts,
Does yours?
My heart cries,
Does yours?
My body aches,
Does yours?
My soul dies,
Does yours?
How can it?
Your head
is as pretty
as a picture.
Your heart
is full
to bursting.
Your body
is as perfect
as a model,
And your soul
flies like an eagle
soaring high above
the rocky plains.
Lucky you.
(Originally Posted 26.04.2019)
Ramblings Of A Fragile Mind 
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