Tag: acceptance

Used To It

It’s not me you want

It’s her, over there

With the sparkly eyes

And the perfect hair

But I’ll play along

And my feelings, ignore

After all I’ve done it

Plenty times before

0

The Wisdom Of Age

The older I get

She said

I’ve realised

That the timing

Will never be right

You’ve just got to go for it

She said

And to not

Be so uptight

4

Recognition

I saw it in

Your eyes that day

I heard it

In your voice

You, like me,

No longer see

Living

As a choice

0

Adequate

I’ll never have

The perfect body

I’ll always be

An imperfect soul

So to get through each day

Without further decay

That

Is the fucking goal

3

Believing

How I remember

Feeling this way

That nothing again

Would be OK

But now I’ve got

Some feeling back

I see a glimmer of hope

Through the crack

Grieving

Are you
sure it’s
gone

He
said

What
about
love

Compassion?

Make
no
mistake

She
said

I’ve
lost
it all

Her
face,
as it was,
ashen

(Originally Posted 18.02.2020)

0

A Glasgow Smile

I don’t think

I’m entirely blameless

I’m not that

Self absorbed

Or shameless

But it wasn’t my doing

Nor was it my fault

That things came to such

To an abrupt halt

I said some things

That were unkind

But in my defence

I had lost my mind

Whereas her behaviour

Had no justification

She practically revelled

In my flagellation

So when it comes

To my ‘tirades’

At least it’s with words

And not razor blades

The Tirade

Don’t stop me now

I’m on a roll

Saying my piece

Letting this shit go

It was you who did this to us

You see

You’re the arsehole here

Not me

(Originally Posted 08.02.2022)

2

It’ll Never Happen

If only there

Was a way

To make the dream

A reality

But any hope of that

Was cruelly dashed

When you upped

And left me

Nocturnal Naughtiness

You
were
in my
dreams
last night

We
kissed
longingly
by the
fire

And
although
I woke
with
contented
delight

It
didn’t
quite
quench
my desire

(Originally Posted 08.01.2020)

2

‘Reality Bites’

In a way it’s easier

To still see you every day

For as we get both older

My heart grows colder

And doesn’t hurt in the same way

Taken

I can bear most things in life

But it kills me every time

To know no matter what I do

You will never again be mine

(Originally Posted 11.12.2020)

0

Spilt Milk

There’s no use in trying

To understand

As it makes no difference

We may as well take complying

By the hand

And hope for deliverence

The Fall

I am
unsure
how it
happened

And I
certainly
don’t
know why

So there’s
nothing left,
for me to
do now

But
just sit
around
and cry

(Originally Posted 15.10.2019)

0

It’s Different Now

Though it took a while

For me to smile

Still, it is artificial

Any feeling of mirth

For what it’s worth

Is purely superficial

Emotional Flux

The guilt
I feel
when
I smile

Consumes
my day
and night

Perhaps I
should
just wait
a while

Before
thinking
it’s alright

(Originally Posted 13.10.2019)

0

Emergency Supplies

I would be lying

If, after he lay dying,

I said I returned all of his medication

That I didn’t at least keep some

To peruse and choose from

In any future difficult situation

Well, in fact, I did

And with how many I hid

I could have force fed the nation

So, dead behind the eyes,

Full of prescribed pills and otherwise

I fulfilled each and every obligation

Acceptance

I
asked
the
doctor

When
will the
tablets
work?

When do
they take
away my
hurt?

Nothing
will
do that,
she said

They
only
make it
so you
get out
of bed

I
asked
the
doctor

Are
you
sure?

Won’t
you do
something
more?

There’s
nothing
else I
can do,
she said

You just
have to
accept
that he
is dead

(Originally Posted 12.10.2019)

2

Fuck Cancer

I will keep saying it

Until I am blue in the face

That I was effectively widowed

At thirty eight years old

Is an absolute fucking disgrace

Leaving

Now it’s
time
for me
leave

Please
don’t
make a
fuss

It’s not
the end
of the
world

It’s
just
the end
of us

(Originally Posted 08.10.2019)

12

‘Break On Through (To The Other Side)’

It is hard to accept

Death is the last

That nothing more

Will come to pass

There is no healing

Or making sense of it all

When you’re the one left reeling

On the other side of the wall

One Night In Heaven

Now
we’ll
never
hold
hands
again

Walk
in the
park
or
kiss in
the rain

That
only my
fading
memory
of us
remains

Just
breaks
my heart
and blows
my
brains

(Originally Posted 04.09.2020)

2

The Mask

I have just gone back

To pretending now

Convincing you that I

Am worth it, somehow

I’ve worked too hard

To let it go to waste

As this persona has taken

A lifetime to create

The Truth

If you
knew
the
truth
about me

You
would
run
away
and hide

You
wouldn’t
waste
another
minute

On
someone
so
rotten
inside

(Originally Posted 13.09.2019)

0

Unreciprocated Love

It will never be

The right time for me

I just have to accept it

As I cannot take

The abject heartache

Each time I am rejected

Each Time We Meet

Why isn’t
it me,
she asks,

Why can’t
it be us?

For I
already
love another,
he says,

As her
dreams
crumble
to dust.

(Originally Posted 10.08.2019)

0

Realisations

Off on
my travels
again

Hoping
this time
for something
new

But
time has
told me

And
experience
shown me

My dreams
will never
come true

Aspirations

Off on
my travels
again

Hoping to
find some
peace

Perhaps I’ll
meet someone
new

And this
heartache will
cease

(Originally Posted 31.07.2019)

0

You’re Gone

It took me a while to accept it

But now I know that it’s true

So all I have are these memories

From those days of me and you

Xxx

Still Hear

I still hear
Your key rattle in the door
I still hear
Your footsteps across the floor
I still hear
Your rubbish music playing
I still hear
Your awesome temper fraying
I still hear
You impart your innate wisdom
I still hear
You berate with fierce criticism
I still hear
You sing your daft wee songs
I still hear
The bubble of your endless bongs
I still hear
You chew too loudly when you eat
I still hear
The thump of your heart beat
I still hear
Your laugh and your wry chuckle
I still hear
Your beloved belt unbuckle
I still hear
Your enticing voice roar
I still hear
Your thunderous snore
I still hear
Your exasperated sigh
I still hear
Your exhausted cry

Oh, how I wish you were
Still Here

(Originally Posted 19.03.2019)

10

Random #176

‘Some people write letters to some people and some don’t. I’m not complaining, but there it is’

– Eeyore

6

Next (2)

Time stands still

As I lose the will

To say another word

Now I know the drill

I’ll take another pill

And accept I’ll go unheard

11

#7 The Banshee

After all the wailing

And gnashing of teeth

There’s no point in being violent

From now on

With my spirit long gone

All my screams will be silent

9

It

You just have to learn to accept

She said

That it is whatever it is

Fuck whatever it was

He said

There must be more to it than this

12

Random #81

“My philosophy is: It’s none of my business what people say of me and think of me. I am what I am and I do what I do. I expect nothing and accept everything. And it makes life so much easier.”

– Sir Anthony Hopkins

14

God’s Plan

Widowed when you're 38

He said 

That's my plan for you 

Well all I can say to that 

She said

Is seriously, fuck you

(Originally Posted 14.4.2019)
34

This Silent War

I’m trapped inside this silent war

Furiously waving a white flag above my head

But no one seems to care

One day soon

I’ll stop trying

(Originally Posted 14.04.2019)

7

Bruised

It’s
OK

You
can
say
it

After
all
it’s
true

I
know
you
never

Really
loved
me

Like
how
I loved
you

20

Unfathomable Cruelty

Only I
know why
the caged
bird sings

It’s because
some bastard
clipped it’s
wings

Yet as the
tears rise
and the
anger stings

The bird
knows it’s
just one of
those things

8

Doomed

Nothing
ever
seems
to work
out for
me

Perhaps
I’m
just
destined
to be
unhappy

To
forever
wander
around
wanting
more

Never
quite
accepting
I’m
already
done for

5

Steadfast

I’ll never be
who you want
me to be

So you’ll
just have
to accept it

Please stop
trying to
change me

Or you’ll
just end up
rejected

6

Acceptance

I
asked
the
doctor

When
will the
tablets
work?

When do
they take
away my
hurt?

Nothing
will
do that,
she said

Tablets
only
make it
easier to
get out
of bed

I
asked
the
doctor

Are
you
sure?

Won’t
you do
something
more?

There’s
nothing
else I
can do,
she said

You just
have to
accept
that he
is dead

12

Yes Sir, No Sir

Okay,
okay,
I accept
defeat.

I’ll get up,
get dressed,
drink tea,
eat.

I’ll take
the pills
you say
I need.

I’ll be a
good girl
like we
agreed.

9

Your Shirt

I still have it.

Your shirt.

I can feel it.

I can smell it.

I just wish you were still here.

Wearing it.

9

The Black Dog

When I heard
the black dog
barking outside

I knew I had
nowhere left
to hide

When I heard
the black dog
at my door

I knew I didn’t
have the strength
to fight anymore

Now I hear
the black dog
on my shoulder

All I feel
is relief
that it’s over

5

How Are You?

It’s easier to say I’m alright, rather then I’m anxious.

It’s easier to say I’m okay, rather than I’m outraged.

It’s easier to say I’m better, rather than I’m broken.

It’s easier to say I’m good, rather than I’m grieving.

It’s easier to say I’m well, rather than I’m wasted.

It’s easier to say I’m fine, rather than I’m fucked.

0

The Corner of My Eye

I thought I saw you today.

Twice.

The first, when you were waiting to cross the road.

The second, when you were ahead of me in the queue at the post office.

It was only when you turned around, and I saw your face, that I realised it wasn’t you.

And I remembered, with a desperate ache, why it could never be you.

And I cried again today.

Twice.

6

A Thousand Years

Honestly,
I could wait
for a
thousand years
and it
would still
be too tough.

Honestly,
I could sleep
for a
thousand years
and it
would never
be enough.

Honestly,
I could cry
for a
thousand years
and it
would still
hurt too much.

0

Travel

It doesn’t matter where in the world you go.

How beautiful the country you visit,

How fascinating the people you meet,

How much booze you drink.

You can’t run away from your thoughts.

You might have a different view from your window but your soul will remain as black as the night sky and, beneath it all, you’ll still be the same fuck up you always were.

Travel solves nothing.

0

If Only We’d Ended It Then…

I finally understand it.
I have realised the way things are.
I accept it.

I am not your woman.
You are not my man.
You are not mine to have.
I am not yours to hold.

We are friends.

This has always been clear.
You are unobtainable.
Out of my reach.

It's not that I don't care - 
I do.
It's not that I'm not jealous - I am.

But now I finally understand it.
Now I have realised the way things are.
Now I accept it.

And it's okay.
Really.

xxx
0

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