With all those years
That we were blessed
If you asked again
I’d still say yes
Xxx
"All my life's buried here, heap earth upon it"
With all those years
That we were blessed
If you asked again
I’d still say yes
Xxx
It wasn’t written
In the stars
Or foretold through
Your wanky cards
It was just by chance
We met that day
And I wouldn’t have had it
Any other way
Xxx
With medications
To administer
And all those wounds
To dress
I think I said
Goodbye to you
Before you even left
Xxx
I stand at the window
Waiting to see you get off
But the bus whistles past
Without needing to stop
Because, of course,
You never got on
As I remember, with force,
That you are gone
Xxx
I know it comes evey year
Yet I’m still no more prepared
As much as I try
I’m still left high and dry
With any chance to move on impaired
That Day
I’m scared
of what
that day
will bring,
As I
know it’s
approaching
fast.
Even if
it’s the
start of
my future,
There’s no
way of
forgetting
my past.
(Originally Posted 05.09.2019)
Twenty two years
Just me and you
Sitting on the sofa
With wine and food
But it’s not to be
As you’re three years gone
So any romance today
Just feels wrong
Xxx
‘I’ve fallen down another rung of the ladder, and I know I’ve got a fight on my hands‘
– Sean Hughes
“I felt my lungs inflate with the onrush of scenery – air, mountains, trees, people. I thought: “This is what it is to be happy.”
― Sylvia Plath
I really did love you, you know
I wish I’d told you so before
And now you’re gone
Nothing can be done
But to regret it
Forevermore
Xxx
‘I get along without you very well,
Of course I do.
Except perhaps in spring.
But I should never think of spring,
For that would surely break my heart in two’
‘The Young Man came to the Old Man seeking counsel.
I broke something, Old Man.
How badly is it broken?
It’s in a million little pieces.
I’m afraid I can’t help you.
Why?
There’s nothing you can do.
Why?
It can’t be fixed.
Why?
It’s broken beyond repair. It’s in a million little pieces.’
– James Frey
Walk down the aisle with me?
She said
The bakery aisle, that is
I thought you were being serious
He said
And my heart just skipped a beat
Xxx
Nearly twenty years together
And what do I have to show
Just a blackened heart
Now we’re three years apart
And sadness the status quo
Xxx
I wouldn’t thank you
For diamonds
And I don’t care
About pearls
I couldn’t give
Less of a shit
For all the stars
In the world
I just want you
Back here with me
If only
For a minute
For my life
Has lost it’s sparkle
Without you
Still in it
Xxx
I always thought
We’d empty the bucket
Before you actually
Kicked it
Xxx
I guess I should be better now
Is that what you’re trying to say
I should be all sweetness and light
Having locked the darkness away
Well I’m sorry to disappoint you
But that’s not how this shit works
Time doesn’t heal all wounds
In fact it makes it worse
See whilst the world moves itself on
I fall further and further behind
For the pain of his loss is lifelong
And to that I am resigned
Xxx
Today is going to be hard,
I know,
But that is why I’m here.
To eat, drink and smoke
With you
And wipe away your tears.
Xxx
It’s better that I’m alone
With only the sound of the sea
Living up here is, after all,
Where I was always meant to be
Xxx
I know what this date means
Even if very few other people do
That’s why I’ll find a way
At some point today
To sit and remember you
Xxx
We
only
really
reached
halfway
When
you
went
and
died
on me
Now
what
was
once
bright
is grey
As
I deal
with
life's
debris
This is why
I’m still alive
To be here
In moments like this
When all the pieces
Fit together
For these few seconds of bliss
Xxx
Your final post
Flashed up today, as a memory
And although just a notification
It meant so much more to me
Xxx
I really
cannot
wait to
driveAll
along
that
rugged
coastTo
settle
in those
mountainsAnd
mourn
who
I miss
the mostXxx
It
was so
much
betterWhen
you
were
hereHolding
you
closePulling
you
nearNow
all
that
once
wasHas
gone
awayI’m
left
here
aloneAnd
that’s
not
OKXxx
Some
days
it feels
like
foreverOthers
it feels
like a
minuteBut no
matter
how
much
time has
passedLife’s
still
shit
without
you
in itXxx
If I regret anything now
It’s the arguments that we had
The silent treatment I gave you for days
The things I did to make you mad
Now you’re no longer here
I can’t put those wrong things right
And I have no choice but to live with that
For the rest of my fucking life
Xxx
Forever
destined
to be
cold
and
lonelyFor I
have
lost
my
one
and
onlyXxx
As that
day draws
ever closerThe pain
cannot be
avoidedTo think
it was just
a year agoWhen my
whole world
imploded
Now that
the darkness
has descended
All my
happiness
has ended
Deep into
my soul
I have delved
And all
future plans
I have shelved