Encou(rage)ment

This type of positive sentiment

Is all well and good

But it’s of no use

When you cannot produce

The feelings others say you should


The (Not So) Funny Man

‘A day without laughter is a day wasted…’

Oh just fuck off Charlie,

Life’s far more complicated.

(Originally Posted 18.11.2019)

Timidity

I know that here I come across

As someone who speaks their mind

But in reality

Words can often fail me

And my voice is much harder to find


The Jumble Sale

I rummage around inside my head as I search for what to say

But my silence means all you hear is I don’t want you to stay

I rummage around inside my head as I look down to the floor

But my silence means all you hear is I don’t love you anymore

What is painfully sad for both of us is neither of these things are true

But the jumble sale of words in my head prevents me from being honest with you

(Originally Posted 28.07.2019)

Setting The Alarm

I remember feeling like this

Every day back then

When it would take everything I had

To get up and do it again

Although now I find it easier

With most mornings not as hard

I’d be lying if I didn’t say

Sometimes I’m still caught off guard


5am

Stomach lurching,
Bones aching,
Head pounding,
Heart breaking,

Waking up is never easy.

(Originally Posted 13.06.2019)

The Limbic Lament

If alcohol doesn’t soothe me

And music doesn’t move me

It’s no wonder I can’t cope

This crippling anxiety

Coupled with impropriety

Has left me devoid of hope

Losing The Will

I can’t think of another ditty

Or come up with a different rhyme

Not when what I write is so shitty

More than half of the time

Hard To Believe

When you find

It’s a struggle to cope

When it feels

Like you’ve lost all hope

Remember and try

To just hold on

For there will be

Better days to come

Dissociation

To not know

Who to trust

Certainly fucking hurts

But to be unsure

Of ones own self

Is infinitely worse

The Old Crone

Please

She said

Pay me no mind

And try not think of me unkind

For I am

She said

To madness inclined

And peace I can no longer find

Blindfolded

They
say
there’s
someone
for
everyone

But
how
can
that
possibly
be?

I’m
surprised
anyone
can
find
anyone

Trapped
in
this
insanity

Locked Down

I
don’t
know
about
you

But
I can
certainly
say
for
me

That
this
is
definitely
not

Like
I thought
it
would
be

Mixed Race

I did
everything
I could
to fit in

But yet
I was
still an
outcast

Neither
side
understood
me

The gulf
between
the two
too vast

Hurry Up

How
much
longer
will this
take?

How
many
choices
must I
make?

Before
I finally
get
what
I want

And you
stop
being
such a
cunt

Optimism

If I
had
any
more

I’d
give
some
to you

But I
only
have
enough

To
get
myself
through

This
bullshit
they call
life

On This Street

One woman cries at the kitchen sink

One man pours himself another drink

One woman sits in her bedroom binge eating

One man gives another a beating

One man rocks himself to sleep

One woman prays the lord her soul to keep

One man paces going quietly mad

One woman realises she’s been had

One man cries for the loss of his wife

One woman downs pills to end her life

They all know, deep down, their lives are shit

But, on this street, they are powerless to change it

Pout

It
hurts
to smile

After
a
while

So you
start
to pout

As your
insides
turn out

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