I play them too often nowadays
Just to feel the pain
It’s better then feeling nothing
Again and again and again…
"All my life's buried here, heap earth upon it"
I play them too often nowadays
Just to feel the pain
It’s better then feeling nothing
Again and again and again…
It was the best day
When we met
The worst when
You walked away
But what hurts the most
Is I was far too morose
For you to want to stay
I cry a lot more now
Even at the silliest thing
My therapist says it’s better
Than trying to keep it all in
You’ve now outstayed a welcome
That you were never fucking given
So if you would kindly
Piss off please
I can get back to living
I used to be quite angry
But now I just feel numb
It’s not what you’ve said
That’s messed with my head
But everything else you’ve done
Stitch my wounds, if you like
I want to feel the pain
Don't call me a silly girl
For I'll only do it again
Ask me why, if you like
But you will never understand
The need, the comfort, the urgency
Those scissors close at hand
Leave me here, if you like
Walk away if you dare
Just remember I never asked for your help
Or your tender loving care
Forget I exist, if you like
It will not bother me one bit
For I'll always have my trusty blade
And carry my own first aid kit
(Originally Posted 08.04.2019)
I’m glad
I kept
your aftershave,
so that I
can wear
it too.It’s the
only thing
that I
have left,
that keeps
me close
to you.(Originally Posted 14.06.2019)
Sometimes it's easy to think about you.
Our memories overwhelm me,
I feel the touch of your hand in mine,
and my eyes sparkle with joyous delight.
Sometimes I can't think about you at all.
My brain shuts off the pathway to the pain,
My lungs stop taking in air,
and my heart, momentarily, stops beating.
Sometimes it's easy to talk about you.
Words fall from my mouth,
stories flow like vintage wine,
and my smile is as wide as the horizon.
Sometimes I can't talk about you at all.
Sentences fail to form in my head,
my voice dries up like a parched riverbed,
and my mouth is clamped like a vice.
(Originally Posted 22.03.2019)
Life goes on,
now I’m alone,
as tears wash
over me
like rain.Time moves on,
as I come undone,
with fear that
I’ll never
love again.(Originally Posted 10.07.2019)
That summer with you was glorious.
I was young, fearless and eager to learn.
You were older, wiser and willing to teach.
I can still recall that first night. You grabbed my hand and whispered ‘Come with me’.
We sailed past the doormen and into the club. I remember that heady mix of beer in plastic glasses, cigarette smoke and pounding bass lines in darkened alcoves.
We danced all night as those songs played and we lost ourselves in each other.
That summer was twenty two years ago, but it feels like it was yesterday.
Thank You.
For JH.
(Originally Posted 24.03.2019)
‘Choppy waters ahead, Captain, but I see dry land on the horizon’.
‘Drop anchor here then, Sailor, for I’d prefer to die in the storm’.
(Originally Posted 27.03.2019)
My eyes weep
As my heart aches
I hope you’re happy now
My mind breaks
As my guts bleed
I hope you’re happy now
My soul scars
As you leave
I hope you’re happy now
(Originally Posted 21.03.2019)
You have no idea
As you sit here
With your good humour and wit.
Now let me be clear
Kindly fuck off my dear
‘Cause honestly, you don’t know shit.
(Originally Posted 18.06.2019)
There were times when I would tire of it all,
But I don’t have a single regret.
I never once got bored of it all,
Our inescapable duet.
(Originally Posted 06.05.2019)
Happy
Happy
Happy
Sad
Sad
Sad
Happy
Sad
Happy
Sad
Happy
Happy
Happy
Sad
Sad
Sad
(Originally Posted 15.06.2019)
Haunt my dreams,
If you dare.
Just be aware
I may kill you,
While we sleep.
(Originally Posted 24.04.2019)
If only I could ask you,
But I never should.If only I could show you,
But I never would.If only you could tell me,
But you never should.If only you could love me,
But you never would.(Originally Posted 20.04.2019)
Don’t worry,
I’ll stay
behind
the curtain.
So you don’t
have to see,
the damage
you’ve done.
(Originally Posted 21.4.2019)
If this is how life is going to be
Then I wish to play no part.
I have neither the strength nor the desire
To risk another broken heart.
(Originally Posted 19.05.2019)
Another headache
Starts to form
But there’s nothing I can do
For all that would help
Stave this off this pain
Is to lie down next to you
You could just say how you feel
He said
Instead of sending me a song
But these folks are professionals
She said
And I’d only get it wrong