The Inevitable

Protecting yourself

From someone else

Doesn’t make you mean

It just shows that you

In my view

Are great at forward planning


Weak

I really am sorry

I cannot take your weight

For my arms are too broken

From carrying my own

(Originally Posted 19.11.2020)

An Official Declaration

I guess I don’t feel

Like this anymore

But in that I can take no pride

As the only reason

I feel any different

Is because I’m now dead inside


What’s The Point?

It
feels
like
I will
never
laugh
again

As my
life
is so
full of
sorrow
and pain

Like
I will
no
longer
be able
to smile

And
that
nothing
I do will
ever be
worthwhile

(Originally Posted 01.11.2019)

Lowering Expectations

I’ve felt this way

For some time now

And yet I still plod on

Perhaps this is just

My normal now

And it’s hoping for more that’s wrong


Zestless

Finally
dropping
into
bed

Knowing
I couldn’t
have done
any more

There is
no point
in setting
an alarm

As
there’s
nothing
to wake
up for

(Originally Posted 24.10.2020)

‘Nothing Else To Give’

I booked the day off work today

As I knew I’d want to be alone

I wouldn’t want to see anyone

Or even speak on the phone

It’s not that I’m ungrateful

Or I don’t appreciate the intent

But people just don’t realise

That, emotionally, I’m spent


Rest In Peace

Someone
sent me
flowers
today

And for
their
kindness
I was
thankful

But
I still
chucked
them
in the
bin

For of
condolences
I’ve had
a tankful

(Originally Posted 08.09.2020)

Q&A (cont)

Then you asked

If I got it back

Never

I replied

That was the day

When it all

Went black

And I was forever

Left dead inside


Q&A

You ask

What

I left

Behind

Nothing

I answer

Just

My mind

(Originally Posted 24.08.2020)

For The Last Time

I have searched

High and low

Over sea

And underground

So please believe me

When I say

There’s still nary a fuck

To be found


Pretty Sure

I’ll look again,
if you like,
but I’m pretty
sure there’s none.

Fun, happiness,
joy, laughter,
I’m pretty sure
they’ve gone.

(Originally Posted 25.07.2019)

Bricks And Mortar

It isn’t really home anymore

It’s merely just a dwelling

Yet if these four walls

Could speak my friend

By God they’d do some telling

Putting The Washing Away

You’re OK

You know

Most days

You just get on

With things

Then suddenly

Out of nowhere

It hits you

At the foot

Of the stairs

And you weep

As you realise

Most days

Will never

Be the same

Again

964 Nights

I haven’t slept

On that side

Even after

All this time

It will forever

Lie empty

As it’s yours

Not mine

Xxx

Unkept

You said

To me

You’d always

Be true

Yet it’s clear

That forever

Meant fuck all

To you

Vanished

With no idea what this shit means

I’ve fallen apart at the seams

Hidden behind these opaque screens

I only exist now in my dreams

Robotic

Take
that
look
off
your
face

You
can
hardly
be
surprised

You
know
my heart
cannot
race

And
I’m
dead
behind
the
eyes

Literally

Last night
I dreamt

That somebody
hugged me

It was the best
night’s sleep

I’ve had
in months

Tough Shit

You can
try it on
all you
like

But
we can
never be
together

For my
heart
belongs
to another

And it
will stay
that way
forever

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