You said
To me
You’d always
Be true
Yet it’s clear
That forever
Meant fuck all
To you
"All my life's buried here, heap earth upon it"
You said
To me
You’d always
Be true
Yet it’s clear
That forever
Meant fuck all
To you
With no idea what this shit means
I’ve fallen apart at the seams
Hidden behind these opaque screens
I only exist now in my dreams
It’s been so quiet
Since you left
All I hear
Is my own breath
As I lie here alone
And wait for death
Take
that
look
off
your
face
You
can
hardly
be
surprised
You
know
my heart
cannot
race
And
I’m
dead
behind
the
eyes
Everybody’s
everythingBut
Nobody’s
nothingBoth at
the same
time
As the
silence
growsEver
louderI sit
and
wonderIs this
it now?
Last night
I dreamt
That somebody
hugged me
It was the best
night’s sleep
I’ve had
in months
You can
try it on
all you
like
But
we can
never be
together
For my
heart
belongs
to another
And it
will stay
that way
forever
I
loved
you
And
you
loved
me
Now
my
penance
Is to
never
be
free
To
love
again
Hope.
The
ultimate
disappointment.
All
that
I am
Is all
that I
feel
And
I feel
nothing
One
touch
Is
not
enough
You
need to
give
more
For
my
heart
to
thaw
It will
soon be
a year,
without
you here,
and I
don’t
know
what
to do.For I’m
still
nowhere
near,
facing
my fear,
or the
reality
of losing
you.Xxx
This shadow
Is too hard
to explain
But it’s
reared it’s
ugly head again
Wailing and
moaning
and gnashing
it’s teeth
The only
way out
is to
hide
beneath
Hoping
and
praying
one day
it’ll
let me go
And I’ll
be freed
from
the pain
of this
enduring
sorrow
I
went
out
tonight
I tried
and I
failed
All
dreams
are now
curtailed
For that ship,
it seems,
has sailed
Why do I
find the
wait so
hard?Is it
ego?Is it
pride?Or is it
because
I need you
to proveThat I’m not
completely
dead
inside?
I miss
the conversations
we’ll never have.I miss
the places
we’ll never go.I miss
the love
we’ll never make.I miss
the memories
we’ll never share
The kindness of others never ceases to amaze me…
…But my inability to replicate it does.
Another grey sky.
Another bleak landscape.
Another version of me.
Looking out,
Looking in.