Tag: experience

Random #253

“What you really want is someone you can hang around with on a Sunday afternoon and watch a TV show with, and do nothing, and feel like it’s the most fun ever.”

– Aziz Ansari

2

In Essence

If anyone asked

About my rhymes

I would most likely show them this

It’s an apt expression

Of my abject depression

And defines my blog’s premise

Innards

Like a
bird

Trapped
in it’s
cage

I sing
of love
and
lament

Bleeding
both

Introspective
rage

And
embittered
discontent

(Originally Posted 28.10.2020)

10

Random #249

“People think that I’m sort of okay, you know, like I’m getting on with it. I’m snarky now and again and that this is the lapse – but it’s not. This is me all the time now.

Everything else is the fun, you know.

I’m not well, but I remember what it was like to be normal so I do an impression of that. But this is what I really am. And I want to be normal again. But I’m weak, you know.”

– Tony

2

All Those Little Things

All those little things

That you think matter

Mean literally nothing

When your heart is shattered

Flowers

You never
once
bought
me flowers

Which used
to make
me mad

Now I don’t
give a fuck
about any
of that stuff

I just
want you
back

(Originally Posted 20.10.2019)

0

When They All Go Home

If you’ve ever planned a funeral

Then I’m sure you’ll relate to this

It’s easy not to crack

When focused on the task

But when it’s done, you fall to shit

Keeping Busy

It’s been
a busy
few days

In
many
ways

But now all
my tasks are
completed

So with
nothing
left to do

I’ll soon
be thinking
of you

And how
I’ve been left
feeling cheated

(Originally Posted 17.10.2019)

4

Random #248

‘So I’ve made my mind up
I must live my life alone
And though it’s not the easy way
I guess I’ve always known
I’d say goodbye to love…’

0

Emergency Supplies

I would be lying

If, after he lay dying,

I said I returned all of his medication

That I didn’t at least keep some

To peruse and choose from

In any future difficult situation

Well, in fact, I did

And with how many I hid

I could have force fed the nation

So, dead behind the eyes,

Full of prescribed pills and otherwise

I fulfilled each and every obligation

Acceptance

I
asked
the
doctor

When
will the
tablets
work?

When do
they take
away my
hurt?

Nothing
will
do that,
she said

They
only
make it
so you
get out
of bed

I
asked
the
doctor

Are
you
sure?

Won’t
you do
something
more?

There’s
nothing
else I
can do,
she said

You just
have to
accept
that he
is dead

(Originally Posted 12.10.2019)

2

I Wasn’t Built For This

I guess I am

A misanthrope

Born as I was

Devoid of hope

Destined across

The world to mope

Forever trying

To avoid the rope

Misanthropic Me

People
never
cease to
disgust
and
disappoint
me in
equal measure

Perhaps
that’s
why my
life is
full of
discomfort
and
displeasure

(Originally Posted 09.10.2019)

2

Fuck Cancer

I will keep saying it

Until I am blue in the face

That I was effectively widowed

At thirty eight years old

Is an absolute fucking disgrace

Leaving

Now it’s
time
for me
leave

Please
don’t
make a
fuss

It’s not
the end
of the
world

It’s
just
the end
of us

(Originally Posted 08.10.2019)

12

There’s No Other Way

What’s the point

In dressing it up

And trying to be all poetic

Telling the truth

However uncouth

Will forever be my aesthetic

Blunt

I
wish
you
were
here
with
me

But
instead
I’m
all
alone

If
only
you
would
write
a letter

Or
call
me on
the
phone

It
would be
wonderful
to FaceTime

Or
if
you
texted
me
instead

But
I know
you
won’t
do any
of these

You
can’t

Because
you’re
dead

(Originally Posted 08.10.2020)

7

Out In The Open

There,
she said,
I’ve
told my
truth

There
isn’t
any
more

Well
I am
glad
you
stayed,
he said,

As
that
wasn’t
boring
at all

Telling Tales

Why don’t
you stay
here
a while,
he said,
and have
a cup
of tea

But
I don’t
understand,
she said,
why would
you want
to talk
to me?

You’ve
got a tale
to tell,
he said,
and I
would
like to
hear
more

Well
you’ll
be sad
to find,
she said,
that I’m
just a
crashing
bore

(Originally Posted 04.09.2019)

4

Obsequious

I kow you’re out there

Selling your story

Accepting sympathy

Basking in glory

But remember I know

Those who dance to your tune

All know, deep down,

The truth about you

(Prick)ing At Your Conscience

Think
whatever
you
want
about
me

Speak
shit
to
whoever
will
listen

But
believe
me
when
I say

I
won’t
ever
rue
the
day

That
you
created
this
division

(Originally Posted 02.10.2020)

4

The Second Time Around

The first time

It was fine

As I was young and naive

I didn’t know

Where it would go

So it was easy to just believe

But now I’m older

And my heart colder

I need to be assured

That you intend

To keep up your end

Before my commitment is secured

Going Down The Rabbit Hole

If you don’t mean what you say,

Perhaps we should both just walk away.

Now.

(Originally Posted 02.10.2020)

2

Mistaking Kindness For Desire

I have never spoken

About that night

As to betray him

Would be be unfair

He only hit on me

Because he was ill, you see,

And his ability to judge

Impaired

Indiscretion

It was
what
it was

And
whilst
we
had
fun

Now
it is
what
it is

The
guilt
has
begun

(Originally Posted 01.10.2019)

0

Idolised

Some have beauty

Some have braun

Some have charm and flair

Some of them even

Have half a brain

But to you they never compare

First Sight

It
was
clear
to me

The
moment
we met

That
you’d
be the
one

I’d
least
regret

Xxx

(Originally Posted 30.09.2020)

5

Waiting For Roadside Assistance

I’m not usually very good

With metaphors

But this one is pretty neat

Then I guess it would be

As it was conceived

While in the back seat of a Mini

Car Trouble

Nothing makes this better

Everything makes it worse

A body straining in first gear

But a mind stuck in reverse

(Originally Posted 28.09.2019)

2

Picked Apart

The title says it all

She said

There’s nothing else to know

Sometimes there’s no big mystery

She said

It is just my truth on show

Bleak As Fuck

I
told you
a lie
yesterday

I said
I felt better
and that
I’m okay

When the
actual truth
is I hope
and pray

That I
won’t live
another
day

(Originally Posted 19.09.2019)

0

Drowning It Out

Do you think

He said

That you drink too much

Trust me

She said

It’s nowhere near enough

The Trouble With Juniper

Nobody
knows
the
trouble
I’ve seen

The loves
and the
losses and
everything
in-between

On one
too many
gin bottles
I have
relied

To keep
all of my
secrets
hidden
inside

(Originally Posted 18.09.2019)

0

Minimal

When feelings

Are so intrinsic

Language

Is best kept simplistic

Random #19

It

just

fucking

hurts

(Originally Posted 14.09.2019)

4

Taking Back Control

I know what you did

That day

How you made sure

Your pain

Stopped

Were You Afraid Of Dying?

It
was
awful
to see
you
waste
away

Neither
of us
knowing
why

Now
my
only
hope

Is
you
are
smoking
dope

At
that
great
gig in
the
sky

Xxx

(Originally Posted 07.09.2020)

2

Death Trumps Divorce

It doesn’t compare

It’s not the same thing

I lost the man completely

Not just my wedding ring

That Morning

You
can
try
to
imagine

But
you
can
never
know

How
much
it
tore
me
apart

When
I had
to let
him go

Xxx

(Originally Posted 07.09.2020)

0

Letting It Out

Sometimes it is sadness

Sometimes it’s deep frustration

But mostly it’s just

That I still feel lost

In this whole fucking situation

Hold Me

Words
can
not
describe
the
hurt

As my
tears
fall
onto
your
shirt

Xxx

(Originally Posted 07.09.2020)

2

This

I reach
for his
hand

Every
day

But
nothing
makes

The
pain
go away

That

It’s
just not
right

That you
won’t be
here when
I look
tonight

It’s
just not
fair

That I’ll
reach for
your hand
and it won’t
be there

(Originally Posted 07.09.2019)

4

On Grief

People say things

Get better with time

Which may be their truth

But it isn’t mine

Not Long Now

Each day brings

Yet more false hope

Along with an another

Earth shattering new low

I really am just

Biding my time now

Waiting until

It’s my turn to go

(Originally Posted 27.08.2019)

23

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