One Or The Other

The urge to bow out

With a bang

Has been never fucking ending

So let’s wait and see

Whether, tomorrow, said spree

Will be a killing or spending


The Spree

I’m
leaving
first
thing
in the
morning

And I’m
unsure
if I’ll
return

For I
have
so
many
scores
to settle

And a
shitload
of bridges
to burn

(Originally Posted 11.02.2020)

Traumatising

There are things

About that day

That out loud

I’ll never say

It’s bad enough

They’re in my head

I don’t need

To hear them said


Pulling The Plug

You did
it on
purpose,
didn’t
you?

Don’t
worry,
it
didn’t
show.

But
I knew
you
had
decided

It
was
time
for you
to go.

Xxx

(Originally Posted 09.02.2020)

Shots Fired

Nothing makes you

Feel more alive

Than the sound

Of a lovers verse

But nothing will ever

Hurt you more

Than the sting

Of a lovers curse


Love(less)

I
really
do
love
you

She
said

But I
don’t
like
you
very
much

Your
words
leave
me
reeling

She
said

And
feeling
cold
to the
touch

(Originally Posted 06.02.2020)

The Price

If only I’d have listened

To people back in the day

Everyone who told me

This would end in disarray

Then I wouldn’t ever have known

Such misery and dismay

But I’d never have felt love either

And for that I was willing to pay


Mum Knows Best

Why
didn’t
you
follow
your
dreams?

She
said

Using
your
good
humour
and wit

Now
you’ve
got no
choice

She
said

But
to put
up with
his
bullshit

(Originally Posted 29.01.2020)

The Flow

Most days the process is simple

Words flow as easy as the pain

But I feel so numb at times

That when it comes to rhymes

I doubt they will ever flow again


The Writer’s Anguish

I don’t
think
I have
anything
to say

Today

Perhaps
there
will be
more
sorrow

Tomorrow

So
I will
wait to
pick up
my pen

Then

For
I fear
I wouldn’t
even
know how

Now

(Originally Posted 25.01.2020)

Random #276

“Watering down your pain so others feel less guilty is not being the ‘bigger person’.

It’s suppression. And it’s wrong.”

– Anon

Coquetry

Alhough we’ve never spoken

It’s still my daily treat

To remember that emotion

As our eyes shyly meet


After All

You
were
here
last
time

I
clearly
remember
your
smile

Perhaps
leaving
the
house
today

Might
yet
prove
to be
worthwhile

(Originally Posted 11.12.2019)

Encou(rage)ment

This type of positive sentiment

Is all well and good

But it’s of no use

When you cannot produce

The feelings others say you should


The (Not So) Funny Man

‘A day without laughter is a day wasted…’

Oh just fuck off Charlie,

Life’s far more complicated.

(Originally Posted 18.11.2019)

Random #253

“What you really want is someone you can hang around with on a Sunday afternoon and watch a TV show with, and do nothing, and feel like it’s the most fun ever.”

– Aziz Ansari

Short Sleeves

Once, I thought

I had no choice

But my innermost feeling to hide

But now I know

That given room to grow

I can wear my scars with pride


Another Notch

A
little
nick
here

A
little
cut
there

It
doesn’t
hurt
anymore

Not
that
I’d
care…

(Originally Posted 19.09.2019)

Death Hurts

This was so true

For much of that first year

In fact it’s only now

I have realised

How much his illness

And his death

Had left me

Paralysed


The Robbery

Your illness
robbed you
of your life

And it
robbed me
of my mind

Your death
still cuts me
like a knife

So now
to madness
I am inclined

(Originally Posted 01.09.2019)

Melting

Don’t get me wrong

It’ll take much more

Than just a smile

For my heart to thaw

But until such time

It doesn’t mean

That we can’t have fun

In between


Your Smile

Even
though
my
heart

Resides
in the
deep
freeze

Your
smile
has the
power

To make
me weak
at the
knees

(Originally Posted 27.08.2019)

Sunny Side Up

Back at the café

A table for two

Talking to him

Wishing it was you


At The Café Window

Sitting alone

The world disjointed

I sip my coffee

Disappointed

(Originally Posted 09.07.2021)

Not Spoiling Things

Pretending I was fine

On that trip

Was just something

I needed to do

So I wiped my eyes

And stifled my cries

In the tent

Next door to you


Camping

The warmth of the sun on your face,

The anticipation of a road trip with friends,

The promise of tall tales around the campfire.

It’s the little things that bring the most joy.

(Originally Posted 28.06.2019)

Overrated

Please do not look upon me

With your pity and dismay

For this last few years

Have taught me

Feelings aren’t shit anyway


Blackout

I
don’t
want
to feel
better

I
don’t
want
to feel
at all

(Originally Posted 21.04.2020)

Let It Burn

I have killed us

Once before

And I will happily

Do it again

For I am

No longer

In love with you

In fact

We’re not even friends

From Afar

Every time you send a pic

It breaks another piece of my heart

You’re having fun

And you deserve a ton

But it hurts that we’re so far apart

No Recriminations

You said

You didn’t want me

So I had no choice

But to move on

If you’d made it clear

How you held me dear

Then your feelings

I wouldn’t have forgone

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