"All my life's buried here, heap earth upon it"
I don’t really know
What happened
I’m not sure
Why I cried
Something
Just reminded me
Of how I felt
The day he died
You were amazing
With me
Your words
So soft and kind
Your touch
Helping to soothe me
Drying the tears
From my eyes
I know
That I struggled
To tell you
At the time
Just how much
I loved him
And truly miss
That man of mine
Yet what I’m sorry
I couldn’t say
But really
Wanted to
Is how happy
I know he’d be
To see
That I’ve found you
If only you could wait
She said
I’d make it worth your while
As much as that appeals
He said
Hanging around just ain’t my style
Don’t you dare
Cry for me
I don’t deserve
Your tears
I’d left him behind
In my mind
Way before
He disappeared
I don’t think I can do it
She said
I’m just too fucking scared
It’s the only way I can see
He said
For your heart to be repaired
I’m not here
For your pleasure
I don’t exist
To be your toy
As from now,
Myself,
I have reclaimed
For me alone
To enjoy
When
I start
To feel alive
Again
There’ll be no
More monsters
And no
More men
I know
That you’re
In love
With her
But please spare
A thought
For me
I know we
Were bereft
And that’s why
You left
But you were once
Everything
To me
For getting me
To agree
You always seemed
To have the knack
But I’ve been moving on
All summer long
And now I know
I’ll never look back
Do you ever
Think of me
When you’re lying
In her bed?
Because I don’t ever
Think of you
Happy she’s stuck with you
Instead
A heart
Dejected
Words
Neglected
People
Rejected
Yet challenge
Accepted
After all
Is said
And done
I think
It’s time
We both
Move on
I’d just about
Come to terms
With losing
Everything
But then I saw you
With your new tattoo
And the size
Of her fucking ring
You’ll no longer tell
Me what to do
How to think
Or to behave
Now the stars have aligned
I know my own mind
And I’ll take it
To my grave
Maybe
I should move
She said
Start again
Somewhere new
It doesn’t matter
Where you go
He said
The guilt
Will follow you
Reflecting on
Our last
Little
Tête-à-tête
I feel like
I’ve won,
Finally
As this time
I cared
Far less
About you
Than you
Have ever
Cared about me
I often think
Of that night
And how events
Proceeded
Because being seduced
Was the confidence boost
That I so sorely
I needed
It's like now
He's gone
We're missing
The glue
And the bond
Is broken
Between me
And you
It doesn’t matter
What you do
Or how many fantasies
You suggest
As nothing can beat
The reality
That plays
Inside my head
I know
What they say
But it’s simply
Not true
Because at the end
Of the day
There’s no one
Like you
How did it come to be
He said
That you no longer care
Because I chose to live carefree
She said
And turned my back on despair
One million men
Could lay in my bed
But you’d still be the one
Stuck in my head
Even if I tried
A million women instead
I wouldn’t even be vaguely
Interested
Here again
Home alone
Pacing, waiting
By the phone
Hoping to hear
That familiar tone
And to read our date
Has been postponed
I hope
You’re sleeping soundly
All tucked up
In your bed
I hope that guilt
Isn’t shouting too loudly
Inside your pretty
Little head
I hope
You’re remembering proudly
All those actions
That you took
And I hope
You’re realising quite roundly
How I no longer
Give a fuck
You just haven’t met the one
They said
You just need to give it time
You just need to fuck off
She said
You just don’t get to decide
It wasn’t
That I didn’t see you
I knew
You were standing
Right there
It was more
That I
Just ignored you
And passed by
Without
A care
You see you
Are quite unimportant
And mean not a thing
To me
And mine
So I suggest
That you also
Start walking
And stop wasting
Everyone’s time
I’m glad
It all
Was good
For you
And that
It worked
Out well
Now I
Will just
Stay here
Alone
Languishing
In hell
Life is better
He said
Than it was
Your progress
You can’t deny
That doesn’t mean
She said
I don’t still dream
Of stabbing you
In the eye
Please
excuse my
awkwardness
I know
I look like
quite the
amateur
I’m just
not sure
of the
etiquette,
yet
Let alone
all of the
vernacular
When it came
To us
Breaking up
She said
You weren’t
The only
Determinant
Our love
She said
Was temporary
But my grief
Is permanent
Now I can take
Longer strokes
And can draw
Bigger breaths
Perhaps one day
I’ll swim away
And escape
These murky depths
(Compass)ion
It must
be so easy
for you
Loving
your life
as you do
But spare a
thought for
the likes of me
Who drown
in a sea of
melancholy
(Originally Posted 23.02.2020)
It wasn’t that
After our spat
I just put up
The ‘no vacancies’ sign
But I sold the whole
B & B
And left all your bullshit
Behind
No Vacancies
I don’t
want you
to visit
When all
you bring
is pain
I’d rather
stay home
alone
And break
this toxic
chain
(Originally Posted 23.02.2020)
Ramblings Of A Fragile Mind 
You must be logged in to post a comment.