‘Feel sick and dirty,
More dead than alive…’
"All my life's buried here, heap earth upon it"
‘Feel sick and dirty,
More dead than alive…’
‘You give me miles and miles of mountains
And I’ll ask for the sea…’
‘Hold me in your arms…
I wanna be your only possession’
‘And if all this world’s a cake
Then you took too big a slice’
‘Cause on you my tattoo will be bleeding
and the name will stain…‘
‘Now that I know that I’m breaking to pieces
I’ll pull out my heart and I’ll feed it to anyone’
I wake up one morning
and I’ll look at the wind
and I’ll see a song and music
Though I’ll feel nothing
and hear no tune
I’ll look behind me
and see poetry
– Anon
‘More than this
You know there’s nothing…’
‘Whatever I do to make it real
It’s never enough…’
‘Hope my body gets better
Do I mean my body or my mind…’
‘If you walk out on me
I’m walking after you’
I play them too often nowadays
Just to feel the pain
It’s better then feeling nothing
Again and again and again…
‘I’ll face it with a grin
I’m never giving in
On with the show…’
‘So you can wipe off that grin
I know where you’ve been
It’s all been a pack of lies…’
‘Let your feelings slip boy
But never your mask boy’
‘You’re the shit and I’m knee deep in it…’
That summer with you was glorious.
I was young, fearless and eager to learn.
You were older, wiser and willing to teach.
I can still recall that first night. You grabbed my hand and whispered ‘Come with me’.
We sailed past the doormen and into the club. I remember that heady mix of beer in plastic glasses, cigarette smoke and pounding bass lines in darkened alcoves.
We danced all night as those songs played and we lost ourselves in each other.
That summer was twenty two years ago, but it feels like it was yesterday.
Thank You.
For JH.
(Originally Posted 24.03.2019)
‘Say the things we used to say
And make the world go away…’
‘Stop dreaming of the quiet life
’cause it’s the one we’ll never know…’
‘How many times I’ve saved myself…’
‘Now you’ve got the best of me,
Come on and take the rest of me,
Oh baby…’