Just My Lot In Life

I suppose

I’ve never

Really cared

For people,

Places,

Or things

But just dealt

With the

Endless

Melancholy

That abject

Depression

Brings

Deadened

I wish

That things

Were different

And I could be

It’s a word I use a lot

‘Abyss’

Reading back now

I have noticed

I hadn’t quite realised

How numb

I’d become

Or how dissociated I was

When I wrote this

Dwelling

Pain helps, momentarily.

It provides a fleeting relief.

Then the numbness returns

And living inside this emotionless abyss, continues.

(Originally Posted 12.07.2019)

I’ll look again,
if you like,
but I’m pretty
sure there’s none.

Fun, happiness,
joy, laughter,
I’m pretty sure
they’ve gone.