Sleep Well?

I dreamt
I was
pulling
little
red
spiders,
from
deep
inside
my nose.

Why we
were
drinking
absinthe
before
bed,
who
the
fuck
knows!

Little Sister

I am not
who you
think I am

So please
don’t look
up to me

If you
only knew
the truth

You’d cut
down our
family tree

Best TV Show Ever

I remember
watching this,

The first
time around.

When I
was young,

And
fearless,

And my energy
knew no bounds.

I thought I
could be anyone,

And achieve all
of my dreams.

But twenty five
years later,

I know This Life is
not what it seems.

The Rescuer

We can
leave
together,

He
said,

I promise
I’ll look
after you.

When
will you
grow up,

She
said,

You poor
misguided
fool.

Something Old / Something New

I wandered lonely as a cloud

Screaming the words fuck you out loud

As, like the night, she walked in beauty

I wished someone would just come along and shoot me

As I, in the wood, took the road less travelled

I sat and cried as my mind unravelled

And as we talked between the rooms

I closed my eyes and succumbed to the fumes

Afternoons

Once again
it’s that
time of day

Do I get
out of bed
or stay

Here all
afternoon
and wonder

Why our
hearts were
torn asunder

The Lamp

I should
have been
more careful
with what
I wished for

Because
I never
wanted it
to end like
this at all

Temple Bar

The hordes gather outside your hotel window.

Laughing,

Joking,

Having fun.

You wish you had the guts to be more like them.

Prettier,

Funnier,

More confident.

Instead you’re sitting in here alone with the curtains drawn.

With nothing but your ‘I Hate People’ badge for company.

Depression (Part 2)

Eat until you’re sick
Snap until you bruise
Run until you’re limp
Drink shit loads of booze

Spend until you’re skint
Sleep until you’re sore
Cry until you’re empty
Sleep around like a whore

Shout until you’re hoarse
Cut until you bleed
Work until you drop
Smoke a shedload of weed

Lie until you’re spent
Smile until you’re alone
Write until you’re wrung
Forget all you’ve ever known

The Struggle

When you see me, you see the finished article.

Washed, dressed, hair in place, make up on and a smile on my face.

But you don’t see what it takes to get there.

You don’t see me trying to muster the strength to open my eyes in the morning.

You don’t see me forcing my weary bones out of bed.

You don’t see me berating myself as I sob in the shower.

You don’t see me looking in the mirror as I question whether or not today is the day.

You don’t see me wracked with indecision on what to wear.

You don’t see me soothing my pain as I twist and pull out my hair.

You don’t see me apply make up in the hope it makes me disappear.

You don’t see me riddled with anxiety as I lurk in the doorway.

You don’t see me breathing deeply before finally pushing open the office door.

When you see me, you see the finished article.

But just because you don’t see the struggle, doesn’t mean it doesn’t happen.

Just because you see me smile, it doesn’t mean it’s real.

How I look, is not how I feel.

Cruelty

In a perfect world,

There is someone for everyone.

You meet each other.

You fall in love.

And you stay together,

Forever.

Ours, however, is a cruel world.

There is someone for everyone,

But you might never meet them.

You might never fall in love.

And you might not stay together,

Forever.

Because they might die,

Before you do.

Then, you’re fucked.

Indecision

It's a long way to the bottom
from all the way up here.

As I stand and shiver
I can't help but think...

What happens if I change my mind
halfway down?