Tag: time

Alphabet Heart (Part II)

Aware. Authentic.
Bold. Brave.
Charming. Creative.
Different. Defiant.
Enlightened. Expert.
Fearless. Feisty.
Grateful. Grounded.
Honorable. Hopeful.
Impassioned. Impressive.
Joyful. Jovial.
Knowledgeable. Kindhearted.
Lively. Loyal.
Mysterious. Memorable.
Novel. Noteworthy.
Original. Outrageous.
Passionate. Powerful.
Quirky. Quick-witted.
Realistic. Reliable.
Self reliant. Safe.
Thoughtful. Tender.
Upright. Unique.
Visible. Valued.
Worldly. Willing.
Xxx
Young. Yielding.
Zealous.

Alphabet Heart (Pt I)

Atrophied. Abandoned.
Bleak. Barren.
Crumpled. Cracked.
Dark. Dank.
Embittered. Enraged.
Failed. Forgotten.
Garotted. Gutted.
Hateful. Haunted.
Indignant. Idle.
Jagged. Jaded.
Knocked. Knotted.
Longing. Lost.
Maudlin. Morose.
Nightmarish. Numb.
Obstructed. Obliterated.
Paralysed. Prone.
Quiet. Queasy.
Rotten. Ravaged.
Stolen. Shattered.
Traumatised. Tainted.
Unloveable. Undone.
Violated. Vanquished.
Weeping. Wasted.
Xxx
Yearning. Yawning.
Zero.

(Originally Posted 28.03.2019)

24

Less For Murder

Nearly nineteen years of my life

That’s what you had when you were alive

And now three years on

Since you’ve been gone

It still feels like me who died

The Debt Collector

You’ve
stolen
my life
from me

In
oh so
many
ways

It may well
have been
you that
died

But
I’m
the one
who pays

(Originally Posted 17.03.2020)

13

Switching Sides

I felt like this

To begin with

When I still thought I could move on

But now I know

How fucking hard that is

I wish it was me that had gone

Who Goes First

It’s better that I’m living without you

Rather than you living without me

You’d never cope with this pain

It has wrecked me

But it would have destroyed you

And I would have hated that

(Originally Posted 14.03.2019)

8

Making Do

I remember this

Only too well

Wandering around

In a daze

Living life

On autopilot

Trying to navigate

The maze

That conflict inside me

Never stopped

I still feel it

To this day

It’s just easier now

To do what I can

And to push the cannot

Away

I Can / I Cannot

I can forever buy token things,

But I cannot answer my phone if it rings.

I can try to plug the cavernous gap,

But I cannot avoid that same old trap.

I can seek out frames for your daft wee photos,

But I cannot keep all of your old clothes.

I can find different ways to while away the hours,

But I cannot keep watering those dead flowers.

I can pray today will be warm and sunny,

But I cannot walk around and pretend to be funny.

I can look for answers in the cold grey sky,

But I cannot continue to painfully cry.

I can avoid scenes of actual violence,

But I cannot ensure my wilful silence.

I can try with all I have to get myself through,

But I cannot ever stop myself from loving you.

(Originally Posted 10.3.2019)

9

The Return Journey

It is becoming ever clearer

That I’ve spent too long

In amongst the mundane

Now enough time has passed

With me being downcast

And I want that high life again

The Train Home

Why
can’t
it be
like that
all the
time

Talking,
laughing
and
drinking
wine

It
always
feels
like
such a
crime

When I
have to
return
to this
life of
mine

(Originally Posted 08.03.2020)

10

From Tomorrow

I’ll be going on a journey

Down my very own memory lane

Back to the start of my WordPress life

To the advent of my pain

So please forgive me if you find

You are reading some posts again

But I feel the need to relive

Both the madness and the sane

35

Downing Tools

That’s it all done now

There’ll be no more

Or no less

Thank you for living

Through this with me

And not minding all the mess

7

Depleted

It was easier when I was angry

When I was filled with hate

When I wanted nothing more

Than your head on a plate

It’s harder now I’m ‘better’

As the bitterness subsides

For all I have been left with

Is this hollowness inside

21

The Blame Game

So who’s fault is it then

Yours or mine

Who was it that took this

Over the line?

Was it me

With my brutality

And supposed lack of rationality?

Or was it you

And your crew

With fuck all else with your time to do?

Either way it doesn’t matter

As the line has now been crossed

It’s just a shame that we’ll never know

Which one of us won or lost

14

Letting You Go

I really did love you, you know

I wish I’d told you so before

And now you’re gone

Nothing can be done

But to regret it

Forevermore

Xxx

10

Random #144

‘I get along without you very well,
Of course I do.
Except perhaps in spring.
But I should never think of spring,
For that would surely break my heart in two’

7

Random #143

‘The Young Man came to the Old Man seeking counsel.

I broke something, Old Man.

How badly is it broken?

It’s in a million little pieces.

I’m afraid I can’t help you.

Why?

There’s nothing you can do.

Why?

It can’t be fixed.

Why?

It’s broken beyond repair. It’s in a million little pieces.’

– James Frey

0

Six Years Ago

Walk down the aisle with me?

She said

The bakery aisle, that is

I thought you were being serious

He said

And my heart just skipped a beat

Xxx

16

The Death Of Me

Nearly twenty years together

And what do I have to show

Just a blackened heart

Now we’re three years apart

And sadness the status quo

Xxx

9

Not A Material Girl

I wouldn’t thank you

For diamonds

And I don’t care

About pearls

I couldn’t give

Less of a shit

For all the stars

In the world

I just want you

Back here with me

If only

For a minute

For my life

Has lost it’s sparkle

Without you

Still in it

Xxx

7

Good To See You

We’ve already missed our moment

She said

So it’s best we don’t meet again

I know you love someone else

He said

But I’d still like to be your friend

13

I Know

I know

You’ll never ask again

I know

I missed my time

I know

You no longer feel the same

I know

You’ll never be mine

13

Queen Of The Damned

I guess I should be better now

Is that what you’re trying to say

I should be all sweetness and light

Having locked the darkness away

Well I’m sorry to disappoint you

But that’s not how this shit works

Time doesn’t heal all wounds

In fact it makes it worse

See whilst the world moves itself on

I fall further and further behind

For the pain of his loss is lifelong

And to that I am resigned

Xxx

9

Expired

If you no longer love each other

Then what’s the fucking point

Just staying together to destroy each other

Noses permanently out of joint

Why not just call it quits

As it’s clear neither of you tries

That has to be better than being miserable

Until one of the two of you dies

14

Random #133

“So we shall let the reader answer this question for himself: who is the happier man, he who has braved the storm of life and lived or he who has stayed securely on shore and merely existed?”

– Hunter S. Thompson

9

A Full Refund

Once upon a time

When I was ill

I truly believed

That this was it

I couldn’t see

Anything else for me

But another day

Drowning in shit

But now life is better

I have found

And I can finally

See a plan

So it is time

To return that rope

As quickly

As I can

7

Stamped Feet

I wish

I could

Take it back

All this time

That’s gone

To waste

Now

You’ll never know

Who I am

Because of

A choice

Made in haste

9

Random #127

“Justice and humaneness have never gone hand in hand. The law is not a sentimental comedy.”

– Captain Watkin Tench

0

Up ↑