"All my life's buried here, heap earth upon it"
All I get
If I look up
Into the twilight sky
Is a fucking crick
In the back of my neck
And bird shit in my eye
Somewhere Out There
I’m sure
your star
shines
brightly,
Up
there
in the
sky.
I try
to search
for it
nightly,
Yet it
always
passes
me by.
(Originally Posted 29.11.2019)
Many more moons
Have passed since then
And plenty of suns
Now too
In fact it’s been
1,458 days
That I’ve been here
Without you
Xxx
Many A Moon
As that
day draws
ever closer
The pain
cannot be
avoided
To think
it was just
a year ago
When my
whole world
imploded
(Originally Posted 28.11.2019)
One day I
Will tell the world
And dance in the flames
As your name burns
My Lips Are Sealed
Don’t you worry
I’ll never tell
How much you hurt me
And put me through hell
But not to keep
Your good name intact
But more to ensure
You never come back
(Originally Posted 26.11.2020)
It’s been a long time
Since I’ve seen you
But don’t think I have forgotten
How truly rank
And repulsive you are
That even your insides are rotten
Grandiose
I’ll always
be the
better
person
But
there’s
no need
to sweat it
I will
always
be hanging
around
To make
sure you
don’t
forget it
(Originally Posted 26.11.2019)
Please don’t think,
Darling boy,
That you’re special
In any way
As you were not
The only one
Who saw to me
That day
Sinderella
Is that
really
the time,
he said,
I should
grab my
things
and leave
Well don’t
let me
keep you,
she said,
as I’ve
got others
to please
(Originally Posted 26.11.2019)
This type of positive sentiment
Is all well and good
But it’s of no use
When you cannot produce
The feelings others say you should
The (Not So) Funny Man
‘A day without laughter is a day wasted…’
Oh just fuck off Charlie,
Life’s far more complicated.
(Originally Posted 18.11.2019)
I’ve really tried hard
These last few years
To become more authentic
But I fear in trying
To come out of hiding
I just look even more eccentric
‘Getting Away With It’
I’m
pretty
good
at it
now
Hiding
all
my
flaws
Thank
God
you
don’t
see
The
real
me
The
one
that’s
such a
fraud
(Originally Posted 09.11.2020)
Whatever will they think of you
All your fans and acolytes
Because they will find out
All about
What you would do to us at night
Enjoy My Silence
I’ll
say
it was
my
fault
I’ll
take
all
the
blame
Just to
protect
you
and
yours
From
feeling
this
terrible
shame
But
don’t
think
it’ll
last
As
I won’t
stay
quiet
forever
One day
I will
tell
the
truth
And
all ties
they
will
sever
(Originally Posted 09.11.2019)
I’ll never look on the bright side
Or see that glass half full
As my penchant for misery
Has now come to be
Very much dyed in the wool
‘Jealous Guy’
Some
days
I am
acutely
aware
That
you
have
much
more
fun
than
me
I
suppose
it’s
not
that
hard
to
believe
Given
my
penchant
for
misery
(Originally Posted 08.11.2020)
I should really take
My own advice
And instead of all this droning
Pull myself together
Whatever the weather
And just stop fucking moaning
Worry Less
And
just
get
on
with
it
It’s
not
like
everyone
else
Isn’t
also
wading
through
shit
(Originally Posted 07.11.2020)
That is how
It was back then
When I had no choice
But to rely on pills
One to find a way
To get through each day
And several more
To help me rebuild
Happy Pills
I think
we’ll
increase
your dose,
She
said,
To stop
you
feeling so
morose.
I’ll
easily
give it
a try,
I
said,
But I’m
pretty sure
the end
is nigh.
(Originally Posted 07.11.2019)
You will do it
Again one day
Hurt someone else
In the same way
And when you do
I’ll be there to say
You deserve to hang
Without delay
Criminal
We all
do bad
things
sometimes
Yet not
everyone
is made
to pay
But while
you will
never
admit your
crimes
Just know
the truth
will out
one day
(Originally Posted 06.11.2019)
“What you really want is someone you can hang around with on a Sunday afternoon and watch a TV show with, and do nothing, and feel like it’s the most fun ever.”
– Aziz Ansari
“Of all the gin joints
In all the world…
She walks into mine”
“I hope he doesn’t think
I came here for him
As I just fancied
A soda and lime”
Old Movies (1)
Come
death
come,
as fast
as you
can
As
frankly
my dear,
I don’t
give
a damn
(Originally Posted 04.11.2019)
It would not be
That unusual for me
To view my own mental health
As simply cliché
And to explain it away
As just feeling sorry for myself
The Gloom
Does it
follow me
Or do I
chase it
Either way
around
It’s still
pretty shit
(Originally Posted 30.10.2019)
If anyone asked
About my rhymes
I would most likely show them this
It’s an apt expression
Of my abject depression
And defines my blog’s premise
Innards
Like a
bird
Trapped
in it’s
cage
I sing
of love
and
lament
Bleeding
both
Introspective
rage
And
embittered
discontent
(Originally Posted 28.10.2020)
Another well meaning question
Asked way too expectantly
Answered without hesitation
Although far too respectfully
Tight Lipped
I am
not
trying
to be
mean
Or to
cause
yet
another
scene
So before
my fuse
is well
and truly
blown
Please
just piss
off and
leave me
alone
(Originally Posted 26.10.2019)
If I revealed
The truth about me
It would shatter the illusion
Now, I know you’d say
You wouldn’t care anyway
But I couldn’t deal with the conclusion
For Our Own Good
You never
see the
worst of
my illness
because
I hide it
from you
For you
to know
the truth
about me
would
completely
tear me
in two
So I’ll
paint
on a
smile and
pretend
that I’m
fine
For
doing so
protects
both
your
sanity
and mine
(Originally Posted 25.10.2019)
“People think that I’m sort of okay, you know, like I’m getting on with it. I’m snarky now and again and that this is the lapse – but it’s not. This is me all the time now.
Everything else is the fun, you know.
I’m not well, but I remember what it was like to be normal so I do an impression of that. But this is what I really am. And I want to be normal again. But I’m weak, you know.”
– Tony
Not a method I would choose
In reality
As I’d care about the driver
Far more than I ever could me
The Railway Line
I
shouldn’t
need to
tell you
again
You
must
already
know
I
don’t
want to
be here
anymore
Please
just
let me
go
(Originally Posted 20.10.2020)
All those little things
That you think matter
Mean literally nothing
When your heart is shattered
Flowers
You never
once
bought
me flowers
Which used
to make
me mad
Now I don’t
give a fuck
about any
of that stuff
I just
want you
back
(Originally Posted 20.10.2019)
2,995 posts
And one pickled liver later
It’s a good job
That I didn’t stop
Or I’d never have put pen to paper
Drinking
I fear
I’ve had
one too
many
tonight
Perhaps
now isn’t
the time
my story
to write
(Originally Posted 18.10.2019)
She’s still out there
Or so I’ve heard
Badmouthing me
To her adoring herd
Never recounting her part
In what happened with us
Preferring, as ever, to throw me
Under the bus
Bitter
Tell all
the lies
about me
you like
Spin your
twisted
tales
of spite
But half
truths won’t
make people
like you
And they
certainly
don’t make
you right
(Originally Posted 18.10.2019)
If you’ve ever planned a funeral
Then I’m sure you’ll relate to this
It’s easy not to crack
When focused on the task
But when it’s done, you fall to shit
Keeping Busy
It’s been
a busy
few days
In
many
ways
But now all
my tasks are
completed
So with
nothing
left to do
I’ll soon
be thinking
of you
And how
I’ve been left
feeling cheated
(Originally Posted 17.10.2019)
‘So I’ve made my mind up
I must live my life alone
And though it’s not the easy way
I guess I’ve always known
I’d say goodbye to love…’
Ramblings Of A Fragile Mind 
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