Category: Coping

‘You Should Have Come In Sooner’

If only I could tell you

But you wouldn’t understand

I don’t know how to open up

Or even if I can

Sharing how I feel with you

Would be difficult at best

So I will just keep trudging on

With my cards close to my chest

21

Grounding

Thanks for talking to me

He said

I hope it was of some worth

Thank you for listening

She said

It brought me back to earth

14

Out Of The Blue

I woke up with a smile

Today

All the bad feeling

Had gone away

It actually felt

Like it was the start

Of gluing back together

My broken heart

53

From Under The Bed

Just because you didn’t hear it

She said

Doesn’t mean it didn’t speak

I think perhaps you should discuss it

He said

With your psychiatrist next week

24

From Birth

Why is everything so fucking bleak with you

He said

Why can’t you just stop moping around

For my melancholy is lifelong

She said

And no cure can be found

2

Namesake

Well that’s me back

In the doldrums again

Months of progress

Down the drain

I can no longer be bothered

With any motivation to find

For it’s clear now nothing will fix

This fragile mind of mine

23

Dissociation

To not know

Who to trust

Certainly fucking hurts

But to be unsure

Of ones own self

Is infinitely worse

14

Transgressions

In the beginning

I would always try

To be as honest as I could be

But in the end I fell

So far from the truth

That the line was a dot to me

16

Solo

Time flies

When you’re having fun

That’s why it’s still midnight

As I’m having none

16

Haywire

One minute I’m up

But then the next I’m down

It’s really hard

To fake this smile

When it’s easier to frown

19

Running Scared

In case you don’t come back

He said

You did really well today

Thank you very much

She said

But I don’t believe a word you say

6

The Expert

You just have to remember

He said

You can’t pour from an empty cup

Well mine is smashed to smithereens

She said

So how the fuck do I fill it up?

23

Insurance

What is it going to take

He said

For you to open up to me?

Another bottle of wine for starters

She said

And a money back guarantee

31

Protection

Why don’t you tell him what happened

He said

Instead of just writing it down

Because I don’t want him to know

She said

I couldn’t bear to see his frown

7

Self Talk

If I don’t talk about myself negatively

She said

Then I’ve got nothing much to say

Well perhaps I can try to help you

He said

See yourself in a different way

31

Personality #3

I see you there

With your vacant stare

Drowning in infinite sadness

But never fear

I’ll alway be here

Trying to sweep away your madness

11

After The Exorcism

Things should be better now

He said

They certainly shouldn’t be worse

I really hope so

She said

For I can’t live with this curse

0

The Old Crone

Please

She said

Pay me no mind

And try not think of me unkind

For I am

She said

To madness inclined

And peace I can no longer find

22

The Fallacy of Pharma

They promised I’d feel better by now

That these pills would have kicked in

Well they fucking lied

As my brain is still fried

And my heart belongs in the bin

22

If Mirrors Could Talk

Tell yourself you’re moving on

And they might just start

To believe it

But you and I know

This is all just for show

As you’re still drowning

In shit

7

Sad Songs

I play them too often nowadays

Just to feel the pain

It’s better then feeling nothing

Again and again and again…

16

Dazed And Confused

It was the best day

When we met

The worst when

You walked away

But what hurts the most

Is I was far too morose

For you to want to stay

20

Sliding Doors

There will be someone out there

He said

That will be the one for you

What if he’s already gone

She said

I don’t believe there can be two

4

Progress

I cry a lot more now

Even at the silliest thing

My therapist says it’s better

Than trying to keep it all in

22

If You Like

Stitch my wounds, if you like
I want to feel the pain
Don't call me a silly girl
For I'll only do it again

Ask me why, if you like
But you will never understand
The need, the comfort, the urgency
Those scissors close at hand

Leave me here, if you like
Walk away if you dare
Just remember I never asked for your help
Or your tender loving care

Forget I exist, if you like
It will not bother me one bit
For I'll always have my trusty blade
And carry my own first aid kit

(Originally Posted 08.04.2019)
4

The Faceless Female

She’s back again,
the little control freak,
whispering from my shoulder.

She never really goes away,
despite my efforts to brush her aside
or however much I grow older.

I’ve never once turned to look
at her whilst I try hard to
drown out her speech.

But I never forget
she’s there, berating me,
and bleeding me like a leech.

(Originally Posted 04.08.2019)

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