Category: Him

Missing Kisses

I miss you
I miss you
I miss you
I kiss you
I miss you
I miss you
I miss you
I kiss you
I miss you
I kiss you
I miss you
I kiss you
I miss you
I miss you
I miss you
so much

4

Speechless

There is so much
I want to tell you

So many things
I want to share

But my tears flow
all over again

When I realise
you’re not there

3

Guilty

I got lost
in his eyes
when he spoke to me
and, for a moment,
I wondered what
it would be like
to hold his hand.

I’m sorry.

2

Creaky Floorboards

Tonight is
the first time
I’ve felt real fear

Being
home alone
without you here

What if someone
breaks in during
the night?

Will I survive
now you’re not
here to fight?

4

The Back of the Wardrobe

I foolishly
made a
mistake
today

I opened
the box
I’d hidden
away

Where the
memories of
my life
are kept

Along with
all the silent
tears I’ve
wept

0

Photographs

A
camera
snaps a
memory

Of a
single
moment
in time

I’m glad
there’s not
that many
of us

My
one time
partner
in crime

I don’t want
anyone to
see our
photographs

Because
our
memories
are mine

0

Written In The Stars

When you
fall in
love with
complicated people

Be prepared
for it to
end in a
complicated way

And for you
to be left
searching for
an explanation

Forever

2

Happier

Perhaps we’d
have been
happier
as strangers,

For never
having met.

Perhaps we’d
have been
happier
as strangers,

With nothing
to regret.

2

Missing

I miss
the conversations
we’ll never have.

I miss
the places
we’ll never go.

I miss
the love
we’ll never make.

I miss
the memories
we’ll never share

2

I Love You

If I met you again,
For the first time,
I wouldn’t change a thing.

I’d do it all again,
Exactly the same,
Taking you under my wing.

But I should have,
if I could have,
told you that
I loved you
more.

Perhaps then
my life now
wouldn’t be
so difficult
to endure.

0

Commitment

You were
always so
terrified
that I
would leave.

When,
after all
was said
and done,
I was the
only one
who stayed.

2

1000 Miles

The message from the search engine pings.

Their spies inform me that last month I visited:

Three different countries,
Fifteen different cities,
And twenty one different places.

That means I travelled over 1000 miles, last month.

Each one without you.

And every one with an empty heart.

0

The Act

I can act like I’m happy,

I can act like I’m there.

I can act like I’m over it,

I can act like I care.

But it’s all to avoid having to admit,

That I’m just really fucking scared of life.

Without you.

0

Their Big Day

What am I supposed to say?

What am I supposed to do?

Everyone is happy, today.

But my heart is broken here,

without you.

Xxx

0

Wedding Bells

Who knows
what will happen
when I get there.

Who knows
what will happen
along the way.

What I do know
is that you
won’t be there.

And my tears
will fall
all day.

0

The Past

Some days
it’s easy
to remember
you

Some days
it’s hard
to forget
you

Some days
I don’t want
to remember
you

Some days
I never want
to forget
you

0

Promises

I promise myself
never again
every time
and every time
I believe it.

But the truth is
forgetting you is
a promise
I am powerless
to keep.

0

Home

It pains me to think
of the amount of times 
I wished I'd come home 
to find the house exactly 
as I'd left it

How ironic that now
that's what happens,
what I want more than anything 
is to come home and find you
just as I'd left you 

7

School of Anatomy

He was everything to me for such a long time.

I loved him like I’ll never love anyone ever again.

But then he died.

Now he is your silent teacher.

And I’m so proud of him.

 

0

Tomorrow

I’m not sure how I’ll feel when I’m forced to remember you, tomorrow.

Forced to remember those torturous nights.

Forced to remember those heart breaking conversations.

They were so private, so personal, so intense.

Those words only ever destined to leave your lips and reach my ears.

There will be others there that feel the same way about their loved one, I’m sure.

And there will be others there just to watch. To steal someone else’s story to tell as their own.

Fuck them.

I’m not sure how I’ll feel when I’m forced to remember you, tomorrow.

I just wish you were still here.

And that I didn’t have to go.

0

If Only We’d Ended It Then…

I finally understand it.
I have realised the way things are.
I accept it.

I am not your woman.
You are not my man.
You are not mine to have.
I am not yours to hold.

We are friends.

This has always been clear.
You are unobtainable.
Out of my reach.

It's not that I don't care - 
I do.
It's not that I'm not jealous - I am.

But now I finally understand it.
Now I have realised the way things are.
Now I accept it.

And it's okay.
Really.

xxx
0

18 Years & 290 Days

Did I ever really know you at all, I wonder?
There was so much about you that I found fascinating.
Dark, brooding and mysterious.
Inexplicable in so many ways.
The expanse of your mind knew no bounds.
The depths of your heart the same.
You were so enchanting and intoxicating to me.
Such a fragile beauty.

I'm glad you didn't linger.
I'm thankful you didn't wither away.
I'm honoured I was with you, in those final moments.
Because I may never have really known you,
but I knew that look in your eyes.
I knew that grip of your hand.
I know my face was the last thing you saw.
You knew I was there, with you.
You knew I wouldn't leave.
You knew you were loved.
0

Still Hear

I still hear your key rattle in the door,
I still hear your footsteps across the floor.
I still hear your rubbish music playing,
I still hear your awesome temper fraying.
I still hear you impart your innate wisdom,
I still hear you berate with fierce criticism.
I still hear you sing your daft wee songs,
I still hear the bubble of your endless bongs.
I still hear you chew too loudly when you eat,
I still hear the thump of your heart beat.
I still hear your laugh and your wry chuckle,
I still hear your beloved belt unbuckle.
I still hear your enticing voice roar,
I still hear your thunderous snore.
I still hear your exasperated sigh,
I still hear your exhausted cry.

I Wish You Were,
 Still Here.

0

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