"All my life's buried here, heap earth upon it"
I don’t know who
You think you are
Walking around
All giddy
And bright
It’s as if you think
A cheeky wink
Will make it
All alright
Well I’m here to say
It’s not ok
And for your sins
You must pay
So sometime soon
This recent boon
Will end much
To your dismay
Do not
Fucking
Talk to me
Don’t you even
Look
My way
You’ll be lucky
To be forgiven tomorrow,
Buddy,
Let alone
Today
You ain’t
All that
You’re no
High-flier
In fact
You’re a twat
As well
As a liar
It’s ok
If you want
To stay
I will be
The one
To leave
But just
Remember
When they find out
It’s my loss
They will grieve
When those thoughts
Enter your head
Do you cut them off
Stone dead?
Or do you sometimes
Squint through the blur
To see what a cunt
You really were
You’d think
That after
All this time
You’d know
What you did wrong
How you hurt me
So viciously
By stringing
Me along
But it seems
All that
Is lost on you
From what I’ve heard
You share
So I’ll care not a jot
In telling you to fuck off
And just leave you
Hanging there
You’ll no longer tell
Me what to do
How to think
Or to behave
Now the stars have aligned
I know my own mind
And I’ll take it
To my grave
I’m not saying
You should forgive
But you could try
To forget
It can’t be a life
Worth living
Full of self loathing
And regret
Perhaps it’s time
I move on
And forget
The things you did
It most likely wouldn’t
Take me long
To find reasons
To forgive
But there’s still a hold
On my heart
That stops me picking
Up the phone
A feeling I’ve had
From the start
Something I
Have always known
That’s even if
I was forthcoming
I’d get fuck all
In return
So, for now
I’ll just say nothing
While the fires
Around you burn
There’s plenty that
I could have said
Even more
I could have done
But you don’t deserve
The satisfaction
Of thinking
That you’ve won
I find it funny
You think
I’d remember
Even more so
That I’d care
Because
Everything you said
Went over my head
As you were blissfully
Unaware
Although you’ve talked
For a while
I’m not sure where
You’re going with this
But if you’re prepared
To take a shot
You’d better make sure
You don’t miss
Why can’t we let
Sleeping dogs lie
I don’t want to scream
Or start a fight
We should just agree
To disagree
And end this shit
Respectfully
It is
As if
After all
This time
You have
Forgotten
What's
Rightfully
Mine
I know
We all
Like
To moan
But you need
To give it
A rest
Some of us
Are out here
Saving lives
And not
Just PDF’s
As for your bid
To outdo me
I could not care
One jot
And if you think
I’m green with envy
I can assure you
I am not
From the rankest bottom
Of my deepest recess
I hope and I pray
For your utter distress
As there is no way
You could ever contest
Your actions don’t lie
At the heart of this mess
I’m glad
You’re feeling better
And that
You’re doing well
As maybe now
I’ll have the pleasure
Of meeting you
In hell
Watching you
From afar
I can see
Just why you’re hated
Parading around
As the victim
In a situation
You fucking created
I am honestly
Not interested
In whatever
You’ve got to say
It’s not like
It’ll make a difference
To how I feel
Anyway
For I have
Already decided
This relationship
Has died a death
So you may as well
Just leave me alone
And save
Your fucking breath
I’ve seen what lurks
Inside you
Despite what you’re trying
To show
And it’s clear, in fact
Your crawling back
Just confirms what
I already know
I watched you tonight
Schmoozing the crowd
All good-natured
And affable
Yet I’ve seen you inside
Where there’s nowhere to hide
And the difference
Is fucking laughable
Suggestions on what
To do and not
Believe me,
I’ve had a billion
But remember that
What you state as fact
Is just
Your fucking opinion
I really don’t mean to be harsh
Or in any way uncouth
But there’s nothing
More fucking annoying
Than the innocence of youth
I know you think
You’re special
She said
I know you think
You’re smart
Strutting your stuff
About the place
Like you’re some work of art
But trust me when I say
She said
That’s not what we all see
In fact in the office
The only hot topic
Is what a twat
You appear to be
I’ve no
Doubt that
What has
Happened
To put
You in
This position
Is down
To your
Incessant
Stupidity
And of
Your own
Volition
Has it never occured to you
She said
Even after all this time
That maybe your mistrust
Fucked things up
And this is all your fault
Not mine?
In amongst
All the bullshit
There’s one thing
That’s still true
I might scream and curse
And make matters worse
But I’ll never be a cunt
Like you
I hope
You’re sleeping soundly
All tucked up
In your bed
I hope that guilt
Isn’t shouting too loudly
Inside your pretty
Little head
I hope
You’re remembering proudly
All those actions
That you took
And I hope
You’re realising quite roundly
How I no longer
Give a fuck
I don’t care
That you didn’t mean it
Or if just to deflect
You moved to attack
As now I know how you seethe
Underneath
And you can never take that back
I didn’t tell you
All back then
So don’t think
That I’ll talk now
Just because
You’ve changed your tune
Doesn’t mean
You’ve won me round
Please don’t act
Like you asked
When you
Just fucking took it
There’s no hiding the fact
It wasn’t lawful contact
However
You fucking put it
It wasn’t
That I didn’t see you
I knew
You were standing
Right there
It was more
That I
Just ignored you
And passed by
Without
A care
You see you
Are quite unimportant
And mean not a thing
To me
And mine
So I suggest
That you also
Start walking
And stop wasting
Everyone’s time
Why not
Give him
A round
Of applause
Like every man
Deserves,
Of course
After all
Where would
We be
If not at
The behest
Of the patriarchy
Why the fuck
Would you stay
When you know
That shit
Is not okay
There has to be
Some other way
For you
To leave
Without delay
You’ll say
You didn’t mean it
And it was
An honest mistake
But you’re a shit actress,
Quite frankly
So I know exactly
Just what point
You were trying to make
If we both stay here
He said
I fear my resolve
Will break
Let’s be very clear
She said
That’s not your choice
To make
If you knew
Anything about me
You’d know that shit
Isn’t my style
I’d say
To your face
That you’re a cunt
And not hide it
Behind a smile
The day
Is getting closer
The hour
Is drawing near
Will I find a way
My truth to say
Or will I simply cower
In fear
I see you,
You know,
For what you are
A puppeteer
Pulling strings from afar
Thinking your little tricks
I won’t dare to mention
When all you’re doing
Is drawing my attention
To the fact
That you’re a cunt
After all
The heartache
And the pain
You put me through
I don’t just need
To forgive you
But I want to forget you
Too
I just couldn’t say
Sorry back then
Though I’m ready
To say it now
My only wish
Is that you weren’t
Such a bitch
Who will act
All holier-than-thou
I guess you’re all there
Outside together
Enjoying the food
And this change in weather
Swapping your stories
Of the week’s events
As you wait for the last
Course to commence
Well don’t mind me
As I sit here and smoke
Hoping for the day
When you all choke
And die
As you stand there
Wailing and weeping
Just be glad they’re all dead
And not just sleeping
Just
walk
away
And
don’t
look
back
(Self)
defence
really
is
The
best
form
of
attack
I don’t care if it’s now
I don’t care if it’s later
Because now I know
Which way you’ll go
On the day you meet your maker
The Reckoning
If you
can’t
bear
to see
the hurt
you’ve
caused
Then
feel
free
to
look
away
For
I know
that
guilt
will
fuck
you up
And
you’ll
face
the
truth
one day
(Originally Posted 28.02.2020)
Yet after all
That pushing
And shoving
Saying sorry
Actually
Changes nothing
‘All Apologies’
One down,
A thousand to go.
This shit is harder
Than it looks,
You know.
(Originally Posted 28.02.2020)
Neither of us
Can speak the truth
As both of us have
Too much to lose
In(sin)cerity
You claim
that
you
have
got it
rough
Well
on that
I call
bullshit
As I’m
the one
who’s
doing
it tough
You
fucking
hypocrite
(Originally Posted 29.02.2020)
It wasn’t really
What you did
That was so cold hearted
And ruthless
It was the look of pride
In your eyes
That I always found
The cruellest
E(strange)d
You can say
what you want
But you’re
still a cunt
Your actions
I cannot forgive
For I’ll bear
the brunt
Of your
audacious stunt
For as long as
we both shall live
(Originally Posted 28.02.2020)
It wasn’t that
After our spat
I just put up
The ‘no vacancies’ sign
But I sold the whole
B & B
And left all your bullshit
Behind
No Vacancies
I don’t
want you
to visit
When all
you bring
is pain
I’d rather
stay home
alone
And break
this toxic
chain
(Originally Posted 23.02.2020)
She has long been
The target
For all of my insults
And slurs
But your fakery
Fucking disgusts me
Almost as much
As hers
Celebrity Suicide Breeds Public Dishonesty
So you can
empathise
with her
Someone
you only
saw on TV?
But when
my shit hit
the fan
You couldn’t
sympathise
with me?
Well fuck your
social media
petition
And your
boycott of
that rag
Why not look
a little closer
to home?
You
disingenuous
old hag
(Originally Posted 16.02.2020)
It’s not that I’m inconsiderate
Or incapable of being kind
But when I’m surrounded by idiots
I just have to speak my mind
Never A Truer Word (Unspoken)
“If you haven’t got anything nice to say,
Don’t say anything at all.”
*Silence*
(Originally Posted 15.02.2020)
It’s not that I have
A heart of stone
I just don’t have one
At all…
The Driest Of Wells
Sometimes I wish
That I cared
About everything
You said
But as I have
Already declared
I’ve no tears left
To shed
(Originally Posted 09.02.2021)
I don’t think
I’m entirely blameless
I’m not that
Self absorbed
Or shameless
But it wasn’t my doing
Nor was it my fault
That things came to such
To an abrupt halt
I said some things
That were unkind
But in my defence
I had lost my mind
Whereas her behaviour
Had no justification
She practically revelled
In my flagellation
So when it comes
To my ‘tirades’
At least it’s with words
And not razor blades
The Tirade
Don’t stop me now
I’m on a roll
Saying my piece
Letting this shit go
It was you who did this to us
You see
You’re the arsehole here
Not me
(Originally Posted 08.02.2022)
It’s too long a story
To explain why
But I’ll stand by this
Until the day I die
Toxic
Blood
isn’t
thicker
Than
happiness
(Originally Posted 07.02.2020)
I’ll never be
The bigger person
I won’t take
The higher moral ground
As I know for a fact
Any contrition is an act
And so my rationale is sound
Not Then / Not Now / Not Ever
What will we do when this feud ends?
Just sit around and all be friends?
Forget the hatred and bile that’s been spilled,
And hope our relationships we can rebuild?
Well it’s not for me,
You can count me out.
Of that there can be absolutely no doubt.
Because I will hold onto this grudge forever.
And I want nothing to do with you whatsoever.
(Originally Posted 04.02.2020)
You’d love to think
You’re in my head
Day in and
Day out
But the truth is
For last few years
It’s been so easy
To block you out
My Truth
I wish
I could
say I was
sorry
I wish
I could
say that
I care
But
I’m
actually
not
And
I really
don’t
So to
lie
would
be unfair
(Originally Posted 04.02.2020)
Thankfully
I made the decision
To live without
Your endless derision
Before any more of my time
Was wasted
Poisonous Bitch
We
only
get
one
life
She
said
And
it’s
far
too
short
To
spend
with
you
(Originally Posted 03.02.2020)
Don’t
Underestimate
Those who
Are damaged
As we’ll
Always find
A way
To manage
Stand Well Back
I’ve
never
thought
of myself
as strong
But I
suppose
I have
stuck
it out
this
long
Although
somewhat
broken,
bloodied
and
bruised
I’m
very
much
still
here
to light
the fuse
(Originally Posted 02.02.2020)
Oh don’t get me wrong
Their tears will throng
As they stand forlornly
At your grave
But I’ll certainly know
That it’s all for show
As it’s just their face
They’re trying to save
Daughters
I am
so glad
You’re
not here
To
see
What
they’ve
become
Both
bitter and
twisted
Individuals
Who’ve
lost the
love
You
taught
them
(Originally Posted 01.02.2020)
Ramblings Of A Fragile Mind 
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