Random #236

“And I wonder
When I sing along with you
If everything could ever feel this real forever
If anything could ever be this good again”

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Taking Back Control

I know what you did

That day

How you made sure

Your pain

Stopped

Were You Afraid Of Dying?

It
was
awful
to see
you
waste
away

Neither
of us
knowing
why

Now
my
only
hope

Is
you
are
smoking
dope

At
that
great
gig in
the
sky

Xxx

(Originally Posted 07.09.2020)

2

Death Trumps Divorce

It doesn’t compare

It’s not the same thing

I lost the man completely

Not just my wedding ring

That Morning

You
can
try
to
imagine

But
you
can
never
know

How
much
it
tore
me
apart

When
I had
to let
him go

Xxx

(Originally Posted 07.09.2020)

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Letting It Out

Sometimes it is sadness

Sometimes it’s deep frustration

But mostly it’s just

That I still feel lost

In this whole fucking situation

Hold Me

Words
can
not
describe
the
hurt

As my
tears
fall
onto
your
shirt

Xxx

(Originally Posted 07.09.2020)

2

This

I reach
for his
hand

Every
day

But
nothing
makes

The
pain
go away

That

It’s
just not
right

That you
won’t be
here when
I look
tonight

It’s
just not
fair

That I’ll
reach for
your hand
and it won’t
be there

(Originally Posted 07.09.2019)

4

#25 The Conductor

I wrote this one

On a train

Making my way

Back home again

I remember she asked me

Why it was I cried

‘Because he’s dead’

I replied

The Removal Van

All
my dreams
are dead.

All that’s left
is this room
inside my head,

Where you
once lived.

I wish
you’d move
back in.

(Originally Posted 07.09.2019)

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Delaying The Inevitable

No more for me

He said

That was the wife on the phone

I think that I’ll stay out

She said

As there’s no one for me at home

Temptress

We
really
shouldn’t
do this

She
said

If it’s
something
you’ll
regret

I won’t
know
until
we’re
done

He
said

And I
haven’t
started
yet

(Originally Posted 06.09.2020)

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‘Til Death Us Do Part

Nineteen years of ups and downs

Of keeping the wolves at bay

But looking back now

We always got through, somehow

Doing things our own way

A Living Hell

Damned am I
who has been
torn in two

Damned am I
who fell in
love with you

(Originally Posted 06.09.2019)

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The Black Baccara

It can be hard to stop

And smell the roses

When you’d rather

Be six feet under them

The Black Dog

When I heard
the black dog
barking outside

I knew I had
nowhere left
to hide

When I heard
the black dog
at my door

I knew I didn’t
have the strength
to fight anymore

Now I hear
the black dog
on my shoulder

And all I feel
is relief
that it’s over

(Originally Posted 06.09.2019)

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A Poor Substitute

I made one into a pillow

To keep with me in bed

But there’s no point in denying

I’ve spent many a night crying

Wishing it was you instead

Your Shirt

I still have it.

Your shirt.

I can feel it.

I can smell it.

I just wish you were still here.

Wearing it.

(Originally Posted 06.09.2019)

4

Time Off

It takes me by surprise

Every year

If I can just yet through that day,

I think,

Then everthing will be ok

But it’s not

A Hard Week

Now that
the darkness
has descended

All my
happiness
has ended

Deep into
my soul
I have delved

And all
future plans
I have shelved

(Originally Posted 06.09.2019

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Stuck

I know it comes evey year

Yet I’m still no more prepared

As much as I try

I’m still left high and dry

With any chance to move on impaired

That Day

I’m scared
of what
that day
will bring,

As I
know it’s
approaching
fast.

Even if
it’s the
start of
my future,

There’s no
way of
forgetting
my past.

(Originally Posted 05.09.2019)

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Bien Sûr

Well you certainly seem happier

He said

This is the busiest I think you’ve been

I’ve always done my best work

She said

When fuelled by carbs and caffeine

Auberge de Lanouaille

You
should
use
this
time
to
think

He
said

About
what
it is
you
want

Only
if you
bring
me
coffee

She
said

And
a hot
buttered
croissant

(Originally Posted 05.09.2020)

2

Peacetime

None of us won the battle

And certainly not the war

But my conscience has been

Squeaky fucking clean

Since showing you all the door

Acrimony

Whilst
trying
to fix
this
unconscionable
mess,
I’ve
realised
it’s all
fucking
pointless,
anyway.

Nobody wins.

(Originally Posted 05.09.2019)

0

Uninstalled

I knew you were only sending it

As you still wanted to scrap

So just to make sure

You got nothing more

I simply deleted the app

Digital Olive Branch

You can request
my friendship
all you like

But it’ll
never be
accepted

You can send,
send and
send it again

But it’ll
always be
rejected

(Originally Posted 05.09.2019)

6

Dull As Dishwater

It matters not

How I seem

Through these words

I’ve penned

For if we were to ever

Meet in person

You’d be disappointed

In the end

Telling Tales

Why don’t you
stay here
a while,
he said,
and have
a cup
of tea

But I don’t
understand,
she said,
why would
you want
to talk
to me?

You’ve got
a tale to
tell, he said,
and I’d
like to
find out
more

Well you’ll
be sad
to realise,
she said,
that I’m
nothing
but a bore

(Originally Posted 04.09.2019)

14

Your Butterfly, Madame…

It’s better to have loved and lost

Than to never have loved at all

And it’s better to hide the knives,

I find,

To protect your abdominal wall

The Dagger

At
least
I don’t
feel pain
anymore

As my
insides
spill
to the
floor

(Originally Posted 04.09.2020)

6

‘Tonight Has Taught Me Something’

Having spent another day

Putting my body through the mill

It couldn’t be more clear to me

That sleeping is a skill

Sleep Is Futile

What’s the
point in
going to bed

With all
this shit
inside my head

It’s not
like I’ll be
allowed to rest

With this
sickness deep
inside my chest

(Originally Posted 04.09.2019)

2

You Know Who Are (Part 3)

Looking back, it seems, that last year

I afforded you a reprieve

But make no mistake

Just ’cause I took a break

You’ve still got plenty of insults to recieve

You Know Who You Are (Part 2)

You
really
are
such a
prick

I don’t
know
how you
can show
your face

That
you think
this can
be fixed
so quickly

Is an
absolute
fucking
disgrace

(Originally Posted 03.09.2020)

You Know Who You Are (Part 1)

You
are
such
an
unbelievable
cunt

Your
behaviour
has
been
just
vile

I
wish
you
nothing
but
unhappiness

And
a
life
forever
spent in
exile

(Originally Posted 03.09.2019)

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And Lots Of It

If love was all you needed

Then we’d all be happy as fuck

So it’s about time that we conceded

What you actually need is luck

Nowhere Near

I love you

You love me

If only that was enough

For us to be happy

(Originally Posted 03.09.2019)

2

Better This Way

I’m glad that you agree

She said

It’s most definitely for the best

They’d never forgive us anyway

He said

If we ever confessed

In Another Life, Perhaps

What
happened
the other
night

She
said

Must
never
happen
again

It
pains me
so much
to say it

He
said

But
we’re
better off
as friends

(Originally Posted 03.09.2020)

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The Cost Of Living

I went back to work too early

Of that I have no doubt

But with bills to pay

Much to my dismay

I had no choice but to force myself out

Tuesday

I called in sick for work today.

My heart just couldn’t come out to play.

All I’ve done is lie in bed

Filled with thoughts of fear and dread.

With nausea consuming every movement,

My mood shows no sign of improvement.

I hate existing like this.

Full of anger, self loathing and all that shit.

I wonder how much more I can conceal

Before I decide to end it for real

(Originally Posted 03.09.2019)

11

Novelty Keyrings

My friend had one

Etched with that quote

Back when I was a kid

I’m not sure if

She ever believed it

Half as much as I did

Cinderella, I Am Not

There’s no such
thing as happily
ever after

There is only
heartbreak
and disaster

What you see
in their films
is a lie

As life’s a
bitch and
then you die

(Originally Posted 02.09.2019)

2

Yet Another Let Down

He wasn’t.

In fact, they never are.

Forever

My happiness
is fleeting,
she said,
but my pain
is forever

I cannot help
repeating,
he said,
that I’m here
for you whatever

(Originally Posted 02.09.2019)

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Bonne Idée

It would’ve been all too easy

To enact the ultimate ‘au revoir’

So just in case I was tempted

I made sure to sell my car

#8 The Optimist

This is

A message

From your favourite

Depressive

To say all

Is well with me

Here’s hoping

It lasts

That those days

Have passed

And I don’t drive

Into a tree

(Originally Posted 02.09.2021)

8

On Deaf Ears

I couldn’t begin tell you

How true this one still is

As even now I spend each morning

Screaming into the abyss

#7 The Banshee

After all the wailing

And gnashing of teeth

There’s no point in being violent

From now on

With my spirit long gone

All my screams will be silent

(Originally Posted 02.09.2021)

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Different For Us All

Now I don’t bother

With feelings at all

They wouldn’t get it

Even if I tried

No one cares

As it was my man,

Not theirs,

Who so unexpectedly died

Locked Away

As the
chasm
between
us

Continues
to grow

It gets
harder
and
harder

My
feelings
to show

Xxx

(Originally Posted 01.09.2020)

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True Story

I’ve written quite a few times

About the shit these tricksters say

But I cannot deny

Or explain why

She said what she did that day

The Psychic

She told me this would happen

When we met many moons ago

She knew you were in jeopardy

That you would reap what you sow

She sent an angel to watch over you

While I sat and took the piss

How I wish that I’d known then

It would all end like this

(Originally Posted 01.09.2019)

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