The day
They die
Isn’t the worst
It’s every day
That follows
With nothing left
You exist, bereft
As your heart
Hangs empty
And hollow
At The Winter Gardens
Let us stop
Take a pew
There’s something
I need
To say to you
I have to ask
Now that he’s dead
Do you think
You could ever
Love me instead?
Living In Sin
Do you ever wonder
He said
What will happen at the end?
Blessed relief, I hope
She said
That’s if we’re not condemned
Happiness, Impeded
I thought
I would
Be better
If I could just
Forget
About you
But it’s proving
Too hard
With a heart
This scarred
To move on
With anyone new
Thanks For Nothing
I can’t believe
You’ve left me
Alone, and
In this position
I never agreed
To this bullshit
Nor did I give you
Permission
Limitations
I’m sorry
I couldn’t comfort you
When that text
Came in
I saw
How you were struggling
To keep it
All within
But I have been there,
You see
And I can’t
Go back again
That’s why I couldn’t
Be the one
To help you
With your pain
Why I Walked Away
They just assumed
I was better
Because they
Had all forgotten
So I’d just pretend
For months on end
As we had
Fuck all left
In common
Lost Voices
I’ve forgotten
What you sound like
Now
And it cuts me
Like a knife
I’m not sure if
I can cope
With such a silence
In my life
Had We Known
The more
I think
About it now
The more
It’s clear
To me
That we were
Always
Meant to meet
But just never
Destined
To be
Xxx
Underneath It All
And when
I decide
To end it
Know there was nothing
You could’ve done
I just never, ever
Felt happy
I didn’t know how
To have fun
“Burn my body. Let the ashes blow. I am free.”
– Tommy Shelby
No Rest
Somewhere between
Life and death
I wake to draw
Another breath
False Representation
Don’t you dare
Cry for me
I don’t deserve
Your tears
I’d left him behind
In my mind
Way before
He disappeared
Dark, Even For Me
It is
No longer
Up to me
It’s so
Far out
Of my hands
Now
I only hope
For a sturdy rope
And that,
One day,
You’ll understand
“Into My Arms”
Your wandering soul
All alone
With your bones of ash
And heart of stone
If only you could find
Your way back home
I’d hold you tight
And never let you go
Xxx
Yet Another New Year
Although
Most days
Are no longer
That hard
Grief still
Finds a way
Of catching me
Off guard
Xxx
In Every Lifetime
With all those years
That we were blessed
If you asked again
I’d still say yes
Xxx
“Coping By Not Having To Cope”
When he died
And you’d nothing left
How did you deal
With the emptiness?
I filled it up
With pills and gin
In the vainest of hopes
I could forget him
And did you find
That it worked
They helped wash away
The pain and hurt
Some days did feel
Like less of a chore
But, in the end, the grief
Got too big to ignore
Moving
I remember the day
We got the keys
Thinking the rest
Would be a breeze
But now I sit and rot
All alone
In what should have been
Our forever home
The Gradual Loss
It seems
The inevitable
Has happened
And I have finally
Gone mad
As I’m starting
To forget
The good things
Instead
Of just the bad
Just A Glimpse
When I saw him
Again today
All of that pain
Was washed away
Until I realised
It wasn’t him
And my heart, once more,
Cracked
From within
Dragging It Out
Another hour
Another day
Wishing I didn’t
Feel this way
Another second
Another minute
Life sure is shit
Without you in it
Xxx
“The Nights Are So Unkind”
I always knew
He’d break my heart
And in the end
He did
Not because
He’d never wed
But since I’m here
And he is dead
“Gravely Reading The Stones”
I’ve been thinking
About my epitaph
But I’ve no idea
What it should say
Maybe they’ll just use
A photograph
To keep the ghouls
At bay
Without A Fuss
Don’t you want to get better?
No, she politely replied
I think folks would be happier
If I just quietly died
At The Widows Support Group
Do you ever miss him?
All the time, she said
Each night I cry
Screaming “why?”
As I lay down
In our bed
Do you ever miss him?
Never once, she said
The second he’d gone
I just moved on
To someone else
Instead
Shadows
They say
You are
No longer here
But I see you
Clear as day
I hear you
Talking
In your sleep
As I while
The hours away
They want me
To think
It can’t be true
That I’m mad
And must take
A pill
But I know you
Will never leave
And I am not
Mentally ill
Just A Small Town Boy
Yet another
Young life
Gone too soon
More candles lit
And flowers
Now strewn
Lest we forget
What an impact
It has
When the world
Watches on
But ignores red flags
Finding The Time
Ah, you’re still here
He said
So you’ve not popped
Your clogs yet?
It’s not for a lack of trying
She said
But the chance
Has been murder to get
Funny How Life Goes On…
After everything
Was said and done
And all those years
Had passed
I knew
I wasn’t
Your first love
But I was proud
To be your last
Xxx
“Always On My Mind”
There's no need
For you
To feel bad
To worry,
Or to fret
It's not like
You're "reminding me"
Because I
Could never forget
Vultures
As life
Moves on
And time
Goes by
It gnaws
At my soul
Whilst bleeding
Me dry
Ramblings Of A Fragile Mind 
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