Tag: death

Who’s That Girl?

I don’t remember who wrote this

But I can see that she was sad

Understandable, to be fair,

As she’d lost everything she had

2am

I am broken
I am hurt
Words unspoken
Emotion curt

I am sad
I am wrong
Mind mad
Tears throng

I am tired
I am lonely
Memories mired
Despair only

I am weak
I am frail
Burning cheek
Limbs fail

I am down
I am done
Brows frown
Love gone

(Originally posted 04.03.2019)

17

G42 Revisited

Just a month or so ago

Sitting here alone

I took a notion to Google

That place we once called home

And there in the depths of YouTube

I found a stylish video tour

Filmed by an estate agent, apparently

As part of their brochure

I sobbed as I watched the camera

Pan from room to room

All of those happy memories

Now bathed in brokenhearted gloom

And yet I am so thankful

That such a thing does exist

As a peice of our history digitised

Is such a wonderful gift

G42

Was it really

The best of times?

Or was it just

The worst?

I’ve got nae idea, pal

Ma heid’s fuckin’ burst

(Originally Posted 03.02.2020)

10

In Memoriam

There is nothing

Left to do

There isn’t anything

Else to say

I just really

Fucking miss him

Every single day

Xxx

8

Random #172

“No one else is carrying the aftermath trauma you have endured inside their body. They are not paying the concequences. They are not managing the recovery.

Therefore their opinions are secondary to any and all things that help you heal.”

– Nate Postlethwait via @mindful_tom

8

Waking Thoughts

And so to yet

Another day

Resisting

The urge to cry

In a body

That is fighting

Hard to survive

But with a mind

That wants to die

12

What Should Have Been

Twenty two years

Just me and you

Sitting on the sofa

With wine and food

But it’s not to be

As you’re three years gone

So any romance today

Just feels wrong

Xxx

12

Random #156

‘All that was good,
All that was fair,
All that was me is gone.’

– Robert Louis Stevenson

8

One Good Turn…

I suppose

You understand me now

Why I said

What was on my mind

Well don’t expect

Anything from me

As I’ll be paying you back

In kind

5

Letting You Go

I really did love you, you know

I wish I’d told you so before

And now you’re gone

Nothing can be done

But to regret it

Forevermore

Xxx

10

Random #144

‘I get along without you very well,
Of course I do.
Except perhaps in spring.
But I should never think of spring,
For that would surely break my heart in two’

7

Random #143

‘The Young Man came to the Old Man seeking counsel.

I broke something, Old Man.

How badly is it broken?

It’s in a million little pieces.

I’m afraid I can’t help you.

Why?

There’s nothing you can do.

Why?

It can’t be fixed.

Why?

It’s broken beyond repair. It’s in a million little pieces.’

– James Frey

0

Six Years Ago

Walk down the aisle with me?

She said

The bakery aisle, that is

I thought you were being serious

He said

And my heart just skipped a beat

Xxx

16

The Death Of Me

Nearly twenty years together

And what do I have to show

Just a blackened heart

Now we’re three years apart

And sadness the status quo

Xxx

9

Not A Material Girl

I wouldn’t thank you

For diamonds

And I don’t care

About pearls

I couldn’t give

Less of a shit

For all the stars

In the world

I just want you

Back here with me

If only

For a minute

For my life

Has lost it’s sparkle

Without you

Still in it

Xxx

7

Queen Of The Damned

I guess I should be better now

Is that what you’re trying to say

I should be all sweetness and light

Having locked the darkness away

Well I’m sorry to disappoint you

But that’s not how this shit works

Time doesn’t heal all wounds

In fact it makes it worse

See whilst the world moves itself on

I fall further and further behind

For the pain of his loss is lifelong

And to that I am resigned

Xxx

9

Well Meaning

I was thinking

Earlier on today

How it really

Would be nice

To go at least

One day

Without

Your bullshit advice

22

A Full Refund

Once upon a time

When I was ill

I truly believed

That this was it

I couldn’t see

Anything else for me

But another day

Drowning in shit

But now life is better

I have found

And I can finally

See a plan

So it is time

To return that rope

As quickly

As I can

7

La Petit Mort

I don’t have to say it

You already know what I mean

Let’s to go to bed

To forget that he’s dead

And everything else in between

14

Triggered

They’re always there

Behind my eyes

Just waiting

For their time to pour

Anything and everything

Can set them free

With no reason why

Or even wherefore

32

#16 The Friend

Today is going to be hard,

I know,

But that is why I’m here.

To eat, drink and smoke

With you

And wipe away your tears.

Xxx

17

#13 The Killer

Let’s have a game

Of hide and seek

I’ll play fair

I won’t peek

It’s the thrill

Of the hunt

That does it

For me

Your actual death

I could take or leave

9

#3 The Victim

If only you’d seen

What these eyes have seen

Perhaps then

You could understand

If it was you crying

As he lay dying

You’d know why I made

That demand

13

Putting The Washing Away

You’re OK

You know

Most days

You just get on

With things

Then suddenly

Out of nowhere

It hits you

At the foot

Of the stairs

And you weep

As you realise

Most days

Will never

Be the same

Again

22

Crying Wolf

Remember when I told you

I wished that I was dead

And you thought it was all

Just nonsense in my head

Well maybe now you’ll realise

You will finally get to see

The worst thing that you ever did

Was not to believe me

21

964 Nights

I haven’t slept

On that side

Even after

All this time

It will forever

Lie empty

As it’s yours

Not mine

Xxx

29

Any Advice?

How on earth do you cope

He asked

With all the loneliness

You don’t have any choice

She said

When you’ve got no one left

41

Slipping Back

They say after a while

It stops hurting

Yet thirty one months later

I’m still in pain

If anything it feels

Like I’m reverting

Back to those dark old days

Again

22

Ill-Prepared

I didn’t know it would hurt like this

He said

Or what I’d have to go through

There is no way of knowing

She said

Until it happens to you

25

The Claret Box

I know what this date means

Even if very few other people do

That’s why I’ll find a way

At some point today

To sit and remember you

Xxx

23

Some Hit Harder Than Others

You could have been

So much more

But you drank it all away

I know deep down

Your heart was sore

And that you didn’t want to stay

But I wish you knew

How much we cared

And only wanted the best

Now you’re no longer here

We hope

You are finally at rest

(For O.R)

18

An Unnatural Order

You were always going to die

Before me

We were resigned to that fate

But it shouldn’t have been

When you were forty five

And I was thirty eight 

Xxx

15

I Won’t Forget

I still cry for him at night

You know

There’ll never be a time

I won’t

Just because you’re not here

To wipe away

My tears

Doesn’t mean

I don’t

15

Up ↑