"All my life's buried here, heap earth upon it"
There’s no need to instruct me
I have no inclination to wait
Now that I know you trust me
On your pleasure I will fixate
A Bit Of Rough
Throw me onto the bed
Dear boy
Your body on mine impose
For a meeting of minds
Is not required
Let alone
An entwinement of souls
(Originally Posted 08.01.2021)
One day I
Will tell the world
And dance in the flames
As your name burns
My Lips Are Sealed
Don’t you worry
I’ll never tell
How much you hurt me
And put me through hell
But not to keep
Your good name intact
But more to ensure
You never come back
(Originally Posted 26.11.2020)
Please don’t think,
Darling boy,
That you’re special
In any way
As you were not
The only one
Who saw to me
That day
Sinderella
Is that
really
the time,
he said,
I should
grab my
things
and leave
Well don’t
let me
keep you,
she said,
as I’ve
got others
to please
(Originally Posted 26.11.2019)
After all
That playful promise
It is time for me
To be brutally honest
I’m glad we tried it
In the sack
But I’m leaving now
And I won’t be back
Closing Time
If a
nod
Is as
good
As a
wink
Then
me
and
you
Should
get
that
drink
And
finally
put
This
flirtatious
thing
Between
us
both
To
bed
(Originally Posted 04.11.2020)
I thought it was just me
Back then
But now I know I’m just one of many
Death affects everyone
As we all feel loss, innately
Only You
With my
heart
in my
mouth
And my
head
in my
hands
It saddens
me to realise
That no one
understands
(Originally Posted 28.09.2019)
It’s not my fault
If you’re offended
By what I say or how I say it
It isn’t my job
To hide the truth
It’s my responsibility to display it
Sugar Coating
Don’t
want
the
truth?
Then
don’t
ask
me.
I
will
not
lie,
To
protect
your
sanity.
(Originally Posted 25.09.2019)
Seriously
They said
Do you have to be so fucking dramatic
One day you will feel the same
She said
When you experience something as tragic
The Double Bed
It’s been so quiet
Since you left
All I hear
Is my own breath
As I lie here alone
And wait for death
(Originally Posted 25.09.2020)
Three years on
And although further forward
By the pain of his death
I am still tortured
At A Bedside, Desolate
There
is no
more
hope.
There
are no
more
dreams.
My life
continues
to fall apart
at the seams,
As I
lie here
thinking
of you.
And
wondering
what the fuck
I’m supposed
to do,
Now.
(Originally Posted 24.09.2019)
If love was all you needed
Then we’d all be happy as fuck
So it’s about time that we conceded
What you actually need is luck
Nowhere Near
I love you
You love me
If only that was enough
For us to be happy
(Originally Posted 03.09.2019)
It’s been ages since I’ve seen you
She said
How are you doing my friend?
Oh, things are fine with me
She said
Not wishing to offend
Distraction
Maybe I could see a friend
Or give them a call instead
It must be better than wrestling
With these demons in my head
(Originally Posted 22.08.2021)
Do you know what, fuck this shit
She said
I’ve had enough of being polite
I really think you’re it
She said
And not just for tonight
Unsaid
Wouldn’t
it save
all
this
fuss
and
bother
If we
were
just
honest
with
each
other?
(Originally Posted 20.08.2020)
There’s nothing more to add to this
As there’s nothing more to say.
This may have been written,
Three years ago,
But it remains the truth today.
Two Sides
I lie
in your bed
and I lie
to your face.
I am a
public fraud
and a private
disgrace.
(Originally Posted 20.09.2019)
I wrote this one
While hanging on
For a reply to a particular text
As I had shown it
I thought I’d blown it
And wasn’t sure what was next
As it was
It was just a pause
As you wrote back in earnest
And so then I knew
I still had you
And that my effort was worth it
Reassured
The relief
is palpable
My anxiety
is pacified
Our normality
is restored
Thank fuck
you replied
(Originally Posted 13.08.2019)
I have been here
Just over three years
With 2,500 posts to boot
So if you still don’t know
To expect a shit show
Then there’s nothing else I can do
Brutal Is My Middle Name
And honest
Is my first
Do not bother
Reading on
Without expecting
The worst
(Originally Posted 01.05.2020)
Why bother saying in person
When you can say in a text
You don’t want to get
Back together
It’s just that you want sex
You’ll Need To Do Better Than That
Don’t
get me
wrong or
anything
It was
nice
to hear
from
you
But
you’ve
done
nothing
at all
to make
me believe
That
your
intentions
are true
(Originally Posted 24.04.2020)
If only I’d been honest
Back then
And told him how I felt
I wouldn’t be lying
Here alone again
Ruing the blow I dealt
Pillow Talk
I’ll
never
be able
to give
you
Exactly
what
you
want
I can be
your
standby
fuck
buddy
But
never
your
confidant
(Originally Posted 08.04.2020)
I have never set out
To offend
To hurt,
Or cause anyone displeasure
But I do understand
The words from my hand
Are too heavy for some to treasure
Dear Reader
Sometimes
my words
are so
savage
I even
surprise
myself
It’s like
the page
I must
ravage
With no
care at
all for
yourself
(Originally Posted 21.03.2020)
I love how this one
Makes me sound
Like a player extraordinaire
When really I’d rather
Read a book
Than have my legs in the air
Bluntly
Do you believe in soulmates
He asked
As he lay back in the bed
No
She said, bluntly
Now can we just fuck instead
(Originally Posted 08.03.2021)
I’ll say
I felt better
In the end
But the honest truth
Is that
The only reason
I didn’t jump
That day
Is there’d be no one
To feed my cat
I thought
If I told you
How I felt
That you
Would understand
But now I realise
I was wrong
So I’m stuck
In no man’s land
You said
You didn’t want me
So I had no choice
But to move on
If you’d made it clear
How you held me dear
Then your feelings
I wouldn’t have forgone
Ultimately,
You’ll find,
None of this shit matters.
Tell me all about your life
He said
And what has happened to you
You’ll need to give me a minute
She said
To think all this shit through
If only I could tell you
But you wouldn’t understand
I don’t know how to open up
Or even if I can
Sharing how I feel with you
Would be difficult at best
So I will just keep trudging on
With my cards close to my chest
Under a
crushed
velveteen
skyI lie here,
alone,
and want
to die
There are skeletons in my closet
He said
But nothing complicated
That’s the problem with mine
She said
Most of them are naked
With my self care
On the floor
The noose tightens
That little bit more
What is it going to take
He said
For you to open up to me?
Another bottle of wine for starters
She said
And a money back guarantee
So today marks the beginning
Of WordPress year three
Happy two year anniversary to me
Quite a lot has changed
Since that first post
Not least the number of people
Seemingly engrossed
In reading my innermost thoughts and feelings
Which I admit even now
I have a hard time believing
For there are far more talented writers here than me
Whose focus isn’t madness, sadness or profanity
Yet as I’ve looked back over posts of the past
I see my words gradually getting lighter
Perhaps this is due, in part,
To my life being that little bit brighter
So, I hear you ask, will my future posts just become asinine?
Well, I suppose, your guess is as good as mine
But one things for sure
You’ll still find me here beneath the armour
Writing, posting and chatting
As your ever grateful Little Charmer
It’s four twenty five in the afternoon and I’m still lying in bed.
Trying, in vain, to sleep away the thoughts inside my head.
Perhaps I should get up and go out for a bracing walk instead.
It has to be better than staying in here and wishing I was dead.
(Originally Posted 22.06.2019)
Ramblings Of A Fragile Mind 
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