Oscar

'The reed used to like the rain...

... But that was merely her selfishness'

The Bakery Aisle

You’re in the supermarket on a cold winters day.

You’re minding your own business, pushing your trolley and checking items off your list when your nose twitches at the smell of freshly baked bread. Tempted, you wander over to the bakery.

Your stomach grumbles as you peruse the counter. Your eyes widen as they drink in the glorious delights on offer. Loaves, rolls, buns, cakes, pastries, biscuits, tarts: each as tantalising as the next. After much internal deliberation you finally decide which one to buy.

A chocolate eclair.

You signal your selection to the assistant who hands you your prize in a cardboard box, neatly tied with ribbon. You carefully place the box at the far end of your trolley, safely stowed away from heavier household goods that might roll around and crush it.

You finish the rest of your shopping a little quicker now, somehow lighter of step, and stride with purpose to the checkout.

You hastily pack and pick up your shopping bags but you grip the box tightly in your hand, carrying it safely all the way out to your car.

You drive along with the box calling to you, provocatively, on the passenger seat. You glance over every few minutes, stretching out a protective hand and smiling in anticipation.

You get home and unpack your shopping whilst waiting, impatiently, for the kettle to boil. The box consumes your thoughts as you drum your fingers on the counter top, and your excitement continues to build.

You sit down in your favourite chair and make yourself comfortable. You tenderly untie the ribbon and lift the lid of the box. You lick your lips as your heart quickens and you finally take a bite of the glistening chocolate eclair.

You begin to realise, as you chew, that it doesn’t taste as good as you thought it would.

The cream is artificial and bland. The pastry is soggy and sticks to your cheeks. The chocolate is saccharine and hurts your teeth.

Disappointed, you put the remaining piece of the chocolate eclair back into the box, close the lid and re-tie the ribbon. You throw the box in the bin without a care in the world.

And that’s what love is like.

Being lured in by the chocolate eclair when, all along, you really should have picked the strawberry tart.

(Originally Posted 07.03.2019)

 

Vaya Con Dios

Is this why we were put here

She said

To worship his favourite son?

I’m fucked if I know

He said

So let’s just have some fun

Leap of Faith

Why not
let me
show you
some magic,
he said,
as they lay
on the
laminate floor.

Your attempt
to woo me
is tragic,
she said,
but in
her heart
she wasn’t
so sure.

(Originally Posted 19.06.2019)

Overlooked

What would it take

For you to notice me

Wear a skimpy dress

Paint my lips so readily

Well all I have is my words

So I guess that counts me out

As there’s nothing at all about them

That suggests I’d like to hangout

Finding Fault

All 
you
do

He
said

Is
whine
and
moan

I'm
surprised
anyone
reads
this
pish

Well,
perhaps
if you

She
said

Weren't
such a
prick

My
words
wouldn't
so easily
flourish


Goodbyes

So long

Farewell

Auf Wiedersehen

Adieu

I never liked you anyway

Or the rest of your fucking crew

Out With The Old…

At least yesterday

I missed your feast

It was always the part

I liked the least

Faking a smile

Whilst passing the peas

Thank fuck that now

I can eat in peace

High School Reunions

I
wonder
what

You’d
think
of me
now

Fat,
forty
and
fucked

Would
you
still
love me
forever

Want
to be
together
whatever

Or be
thankful
for the
bullet
you
ducked

Move Over Tony Soprano

If we
went
down
to the
woods
today

There
would
be no
big
surprise

For
you
and
I know

With
just
one
blow

I’d
leave
you
bleeding
between
the eyes

A Waste Of Money

Dearly
beloved

We
are
gathered
here
today

To
witness
this
couple’s
happiness

We
must
remember,
of course,

That
in a
year
they’ll be
divorced

And
we’ll
have
forgotten
all this
sappiness

Swipe Left

Love
might
be in
the air

But
so is
COVID
19

We’re
living
in a
pandemic

You
prick

What
you’re
proposing
is obscene

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