Lighter (Bonus Post)

Well thank fuck for that

She said

As she walked away

With her empty head


Fair And Square

One
thousand
poems

And I am
finally
done

This
battle is
now over

And my
war has
been won

(Originally Posted 29.02.2020)

The Grief Counsellor

I know you don’t want to hear it

But you can’t run before you can walk

There is no way to beat it

So it’s best to just sit down and talk


Cheats Never Prosper

If there is one thing

I have learned

It’s that you cannot skip

The stages

Even if that means

Moving forward

Feels like it’s taking

Fucking ages

If you jump

Too far forward

You’ll only fall

Further back

And all you’re doing

Is storing your pain

For further

Down the track

(Originally Posted 23.01.2021)

Sown Shut

You’re in a safe space here

She said

I’ve helped people like you before

The only reason that worked

She said

Is because they wanted to talk


The Rebuttal

You
know
nothing
about me

You
sanctimonious
cunt

Now fuck
off and
leave me
alone

(Originally Posted 15.11.2019)

Self Improvement Isn’t Always Progress

I’ve really tried hard

These last few years

To become more authentic

But I fear in trying

To come out of hiding

I just look even more eccentric


‘Getting Away With It’

I’m
pretty
good
at it
now

Hiding
all
my
flaws

Thank
God
you
don’t
see

The
real
me

The
one
that’s
such a
fraud

(Originally Posted 09.11.2020)

An Expensive Distraction

It’s been nearly three weeks now

That I’ve been off the booze

Choosing to cope instead

With the pain in my head

By getting some new tattoos


Therapy?

No
matter
what
the
guidelines
say

Or
how
many
braincells
may be
lost

I’ll
slay
my
dragons
my way,
thanks

And
live
with
whatever
the
cost

(Originally Posted 05.10.2020)

Don’t Believe Everything You Read

I know it seems

Like I’m really evil

Always ranting and raving

And wishing ill on people

But, honestly, my poetry

Is just an outlet

I think you’d quite like me, actually,

If we ever met


Best Wishes

Enjoy
your
cake

You fat
fucking
snake

I hope
you
choke
and
die

Don’t
mind
me

As I
drink
my
tea

And
watch
the
world
go by

(Originally Posted 29.09.2020)

Short Sleeves

Once, I thought

I had no choice

But my innermost feeling to hide

But now I know

That given room to grow

I can wear my scars with pride


Another Notch

A
little
nick
here

A
little
cut
there

It
doesn’t
hurt
anymore

Not
that
I’d
care…

(Originally Posted 19.09.2019)

‘A Deal With God’

Modern medicine hasn’t helped

She said

No pill or therapy

Then you’ve done the right thing

It said

By coming to talk to me


Witchcraft

I thought
talking
would make
it easier

But if
anything
it’s made
it worse

It seems
there is
nothing
I can do

To rid
myself
of this
curse

(Originally Posted 18.09.2019)

Buy Cheap Buy Twice

If only I had a pound

For each session that started like this

I wouldn’t need a whip-round

For a better therapist


On The Couch

What’s worrying you today,

He asks.

Everything,

I reply.

(Originally Posted 14.08.2020)

(Not So) Positive Affirmations

You should stop the negative self talk

He said

And just give yourself a break

I’m not sure if that’s possible

She said

With the destruction I’ve left in my wake


Adjourned

Those
words
you
spoke
so softly

Are
etched
upon
my
brain

A
reminder
of
how
I really
did

Fuck
things
up
again

(Originally Posted 05.07.2020)

The Cliché Continues

So I’m hearing you say you feel empty

He said

Could you expand further on this

Haven’t you heard enough

She said

To put an end to this bullshit


Such A Cliché

I don’t
know if
you’re
aware

She
said

But
I’ve
been
feeling
rather
down

Let me
fetch my
notebook

He
said

Reaching
forward
with a
frown

(Originally Posted 26.05.2020)

It’s Not Rocket Science

You should start a diary

He said

And we can talk it through next week

I’ve been keeping one for years

She said

If you’d like to sneak a peek


‘What’s Good For The Goose…’

Just write it down

He said

How hard can it be

But he had never encountered

Someone as fucked up as me

(Originally Posted 25.04.2020)

Relieved

The scars I carry

Across my body

May well be off the chart

But now I focus

On pulling myself together

Instead of tearing myself apart


Relief

As I
open
up my
scars

The
blood
flows
once
more

As I
begin
to see
stars

I fall,
sated,
to the
floor

(Originally Posted 03.04.2020)

Learning The Hard Way

I remember the inspiration

For this one

It was based on

A session I’d had

With a particularly

Shitty therapist

Back when I

Was clinically mad

He said my struggles

Were my own fault

And to get better

I ‘must try harder’

Yet I was the one

Who apologised to him

Like I was forced to

With my father

I’ve realised since

That I’d been conditioned

To seek out

The approval of men

To say sorry

For my shortcomings

To promise never

To do it again

But I

Am getting older now

And I can feel

The strength in myself

So all those men

Who have fucked me over

Can go and rot

In hell


Must Try Harder

You must try harder, he says

Harder to smile

Harder to laugh

Harder to forgive

Harder to forget

Harder to live again

Harder to love again

You must try harder, he says

I can’t, she whispers

I’m sorry

(Originally Posted 24.03.2019)

Someone’s Hero Somewhere

I am still amazed

To this day

That anyone continues reading

Who knew there could be

Such a community

For those with hearts that are bleeding


Nobody’s Hero

Please
take no
notice
of me

For I’m
as fucked
as anyone
can be

So don’t
let what
I write
enthrall

As they
are just
words,
after all

(Originally Posted 16.03.2020)

#17 The Therapist

Come sit in the comfy chair

And I’ll tell you why you’re ill

We’ve got all night

To spend speaking shite

When your insurance is footing the bill

Settle In

Tell me all about your life

He said

And what has happened to you

You’ll need to give me a minute

She said

To think all this shit through

L’appel du Vide

I knew from the beginning

He said

Within you there was a spark

Writing is now a passion

She said

With misery my trademark

‘You Should Have Come In Sooner’

If only I could tell you

But you wouldn’t understand

I don’t know how to open up

Or even if I can

Sharing how I feel with you

Would be difficult at best

So I will just keep trudging on

With my cards close to my chest

Grounding

Thanks for talking to me

He said

I hope it was of some worth

Thank you for listening

She said

It brought me back to earth

From Under The Bed

Just because you didn’t hear it

She said

Doesn’t mean it didn’t speak

I think perhaps you should discuss it

He said

With your psychiatrist next week

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