"All my life's buried here, heap earth upon it"
There are things
About that day
That out loud
I’ll never say
It’s bad enough
They’re in my head
I don’t need
To hear them said
Pulling The Plug
You did
it on
purpose,
didn’t
you?
Don’t
worry,
it
didn’t
show.
But
I knew
you
had
decided
It
was
time
for you
to go.
Xxx
(Originally Posted 09.02.2020)
My heart aches just
That little bit more
As I read this
With a sigh
Remembering the time
With your hand in mine
Crying
We said goodbye
Xxx
‘Everything Must Go’
Don’t
say
anything
else
He
said
Please,
just
hold
my
hand
I’ll
stay
until
we
reach
She
said
Our
line in
the
sand
(Originally Posted 07.02.2020)
So much changes
When your partner dies
Infinitely more
Than you would ever realise
Soul Bar(e)ing
I mourn
the loss
of us
Even more
than the
loss of
you
(Originally Posted 23.01.2020)
I can get through
Most days now
Without crying
Over you
But sometimes it hits
Like a ton of bricks
And there is nothing
I can do
Recurring
The tears I cried
When you died
Will never fully dry
For with each day
Dawns a new array
Of pain I can’t deny
Xxx
(Originally Posted 22.01.2021)
It’s hard at times
For me to explain
As I want to protect you
From feeling my pain
And it’s never your fault
When I’m triggered like this
But when you hold my hand
It reminds me of his
‘Hand In Glove’
Some days
your hand
fits
perfectly
in mine
Our love
flows freely
and
sparkles
like wine
Some days
I can’t
bear
to hold
your hand
For
reasons
you
couldn’t
understand
(Originally Posted 21.01.2020)
I found a way
In the end
I put them all in the bin
Now I only wince
If I catch a glimpse
Of those that I keep within
I Can’t Wait
I can’t
wait for
the day
When I
no longer
wince
At
every
glimpse
Of
your
photo
(Originally Posted 07.01.2020)
The worst is in the office
With the radio on
And no-one bats an eyelid
When they play our favourite song
Xxx
Name That Tune
People play
those songs
With no notion
of this pain
No idea that
when I hear them
My heart bleeds
for you again
(Originally Posted 18.12.2019)
You may well have been dead
Nearly four years to the day
Yet you still have the power
To take my breath away
Xxx
A Different Coat
I cried for
hours this
morning
I found your
notebook in
my pocket
Now I’ve
started to
read it
I don’t
know how
to stop it
(Originally Posted 19.11.2019)
It’s never too far away
That shadow
I see it from the corner
Of my eye
An ever present reminder
Of what we lost
And when we had
To say goodbye
Mourning
Darkness
casts a
shadow
over my
head
As it
does
over
my
heart
Thoughts
and
dreams
of you
abound
As does
sorrow
that
we’d to
part
(Originally Posted 27.09.2019)
To be fair
I have gotten better
I can look at a photo
Or read a letter
But I find it best
Not to get too immersed
Because, after all,
It still fucking hurts
Wall Art
I can’t
look at
your
photos
anymore
They make
my heart
too heavy
and my eyes
too sore
(Originally Posted 20.09.2019)
Having been in this situation
More than once
I made sure to learn from it
So now I immediately
Draw the line
The second I smell bullshit
Distortion
You
tell
your
truth
And
I’ll
tell
mine
But
we
both
know
Who
crossed
the
line
(Originally Posted 26.06.2020)
If only I could make it better
But there is no way that I can
For you have lost her forever
Just the same as I lost my man
Real Talk
It
hurts
my
heart
To
hear
you
cry
And
watch
you
break
Like
this
As
your
life
Falls
apart
And
you
stare
Into
the
abyss
(Originally Posted 25.06.2020)
I sense more of this type coming
And to be honest
I’m a little afraid
Not only to reread them
But also to relive them
Knowing how I’m capable of such again
The Note
It was the lonliness
That got to me
If I’m honest
In the end
Sitting here
Just quietly
But all alone
Yet again
Desperately trying
But failing
My broken heart
To mend
And all the while
Convinced
That the rope
Was my only friend
(Originally Posted 16.06.2020)
Touch me again
And I’ll break your arm
For I’m older and stronger now
You can’t do me any more harm
Don’t you worry
I will never tell
How much you hurt me
And put me through hell
But not to keep
Your good name intact
But more to ensure
You never come back
Your final post
Flashed up today, as a memory
And although just a notification
It meant so much more to me
Xxx
At
this
point
I’ll
try
anything
She
said
It
can’t
do any
harm
Then
you
should
take
this
one
He
said
It’ll
work
like a
charm
People play
those songsWith no notion
of this painNo idea that
when I hear themMy heart bleeds
for you again
Biting my nails
until they bleed,
doesn’t give me
the relief I need.
Scratching my skin
until it’s breaking,
doesn’t stop my
heart from aching.
When will it end,
this pain I’m feeling?
When does it stop,
when do I start healing?
Ramblings Of A Fragile Mind 