Tag: worry

Self Preservation

Stop giving

It all away

And save some

For yourself

If you carry on

It’ll all be gone

And you’ll destroy

Your mental health

0

Manic Panic

I know

You’ll think

I’m stupid

And say

I’m off 

My head

But the seeds

Of doubt

Have rooted

And now

I’m filled

With dread

6

Overthinking Again

I don’t think I can cope

She said

With all this worry

And stress

My heart

Just won’t stop pounding

And my head’s

A fucking mess

Maybe I’ll just end it

She said

That could be

For the best

As within

The peace and quiet

I might finally

Get some rest

4

Your Alloted Time Slot

You must start moving on

My friend

As it won’t be long

Until the end

And when you look back

You’ll rue the day

That you gave all

Of your time away

Overheard

All
you
do is
bitch
and
moan

And
I listen,
with
a sigh

For you
can’t
seem
to see
what
I do

That’s
your
life,
passing
you by

(Originally Posted 20.02.2020)

2

#12 The Worrier

Does it matter

If I do

Or don’t

Should it matter

If I will

Or won’t

Why can’t it be easy

To decide

Without strain

When will I stop

Churning it over

Again

11

Expectation

If all I had to do

Was tolerate you

Then really

You should’ve just asked

It was when I thought

You wanted more

That I totally

Fucking cracked

22

Failure

I pride myself on my planning

I write lists day after day

I schedule my time wisely

So that nothing gets in the way

I prepare for every eventuality

Without a pause for breath

But the one thing I didn’t account for

Was your untimely death

Xxx

18

Aftermath

Confusion reigns
As my head struggles to explain
What I feel inside my heart

Sadness remains
As with all encompassing pain
I hate that we have to part

(Originally Posted 06.07.2019)

4

Alone

It’s
just
fear

That’s
all
it
is

That
when
push
comes
to
shove

It’ll
all
end
like
this

6

Stricken

Recent
events
have
taken
their
toll

On
my
body
and
my
mind

I
just
wish
I
could
go
back
to
when

I
didn’t
feel
so
sick
inside

20

Relief

As I
open
up my
scars

The
blood
flows
once
more

As I
begin
to see
stars

I fall,
sated,
to the
floor

7

Surreal

It is
just so
unbelievable

That things
have come
to this

Who or
what will
save us?

As we
stare into
the abyss…

14

Virulent

Whilst
social
distancing

And just
about
subsisting

To what
we are
witnessing

There is
no point
resisting

8

Dear Reader

Sometimes
my words
are so
savage

I even
surprise
myself

It’s like
the page
I must
ravage

With no
care at
all for
yourself

11

Emancipation

I’m so
happy
I got
out of
there

As my
mind
was
going
fuck
knows
where

At
least
now
a smile
I can
wear

Whilst
I walk
around
without
a care

3

Who Gives A Shit

Have
I
done
the
wrong
thing
again?

I
suppose
only
time
will
tell

Until
then
I’ll
try to
keep
myself
sane

Whilst
preparing
to
burn
in
hell

10

Better Off Dead

Sometimes
I
wonder,

Is
this all
there is?

Just
boredom,
emptiness

And your
endless
bullshit?

I couldn’t
think of
anything
nicer,

Than to be
somewhere
else
instead.

Far from
all the
anxiety
and pain,

And your
words
plaguing
my head.

21

Reassured

The relief
is palpable

My anxiety
is pacified

Our normality
is restored

Thank fuck
you replied

0

Creaky Floorboards

Tonight is
the first time
I’ve felt real fear

Being
home alone
without you here

What if someone
breaks in during
the night?

Will I survive
now you’re not
here to fight?

4

Careless

Waking up to find that,
once again,
I’ve lost my mind
at some point
during the night…

0

Wednesday 11am (Pt 2)

So I managed,
in the end,
to get out of bed

And it’s been a
shitty day so far,
just as I said

So I was right,
I should never
have tried

For I’ll never
escape this
pain inside

5

Wednesday 2.30am (Pt 1)

I can’t even
bear the thought
of what’s to
come tomorrow

No doubt
it’ll just
be more misery
and sorrow

Perhaps I’d
be better
off staying
in bed

Then I might
just escape
these thoughts
in my head

3

Crutches

I fear
I have
lent on
you once
too often,
and now
you are
as broken
as me.

I should
never have
asked for
your help,
to be
honest,
as now
you’ll never
be free.

0

Living with Hypochondria

There is something wrong with me.
I just know it.
I don't feel right.
I haven't for sometime now.
I don't know what it is.

I get headaches. 
Crushing, pounding headaches.
Cannot finish cigarettes, 
because of the headaches.

I'm always itching,
Skin crawling.
Can't stay in one position for too long,
 as my bones ache.
Sickness burns in my stomach,
constantly queasy.
My sleep patterns are disturbed.

I have bruises on my arms and legs, 
Lumps and bumps everywhere.
I feel dizzy all the time, 
Stumbling when I walk. 
I cannot concentrate my mind.
My own wheeze wakes me up. 

There is something wrong with me.
I just know it.
I don't feel right.
I haven't for sometime now.
I don't know what it is.

But there's no way I can see a doctor. 
I'm too scared for that.
They might just confirm I'm really ill,
after all...

6

Up ↑