Putting It Bluntly

I’ll say

I felt better

In the end

But the honest truth

Is that

The only reason

I didn’t jump

That day

Is there’d be no one

To feed my cat

The End Of The Road

Pretending gets tiring

After a while

So in the end you stop

With no cylinders left firing

And an inibility to smile

It’s back up to that rooftop

The Noose Tightens

Today has
been like
scratching
a brick wall

I didn’t
see this
one coming
at all

Everything
I’ve done
has made me
feel worse

I cannot
shrug this
nightmarish
curse

It feels
ridiculously
melodramatic
to say

But I
really don’t
think there’s
another way

All that
appeals
to me now
is that rope

As finally
it seems I’ve
abandoned
all hope

(Originally Posted 21.08.2019)

Try Harder Next Time

The monster who lives

Under my bed

Whispers again

Why aren’t you dead

Berating me

For writing instead

When all the time

That rope’s still in the shed

The Hangman

I really
try my
best to
cope and
not just
sit around
and mope
but as
time moves
on I
know there’s
no hope
I can
forget the
past and
avoid the
rope that
silently
whispers my
name

(Originally Posted 02.07.2019)

Sailing

‘Choppy waters ahead, Captain, but I see dry land on the horizon’.

‘Drop anchor here then, Sailor, for I’d prefer to die in the storm’.

(Originally Posted 27.03.2019)

The Darkness

The darker nights 
Are drawing in,
Not least those
In my heart.

I should stop
Drinking bathtub gin,
Now that would
Be a start.

(Originally Posted 09.04.2019)

Even My Tissues Have Issues

Will there ever come a day

When I won’t feel so sad

What the hell did I do

That was so fucking bad

All I ever wanted

Was to live a life free from pain

And yet it seems I am destined

To walk forever in the rain

How Long Has It Been Now?

From this cold embittered heart

I just cannot be prised apart

Like a leech on an open wound

Oh, is there any hope for me

From the past to be set free

And to love again become more attuned?

🖤

The Railway Line

I
shouldn’t
need to
tell you
again

You
must
already
know

I
don’t
want to
be here
anymore

Please
just
let me
go

The Dead Of Night

The
dark
nights
are
drawing
in

And
there’s
some
comfort
in that

For
when
I finally
slink
away

They
won’t
know
I’m not
coming
back

Flashback

The
figure
creeps
around
outside

As I
watch
the
darkness
descend

I lie
there
rigid,
fraught
with fear

As
I know
how this
will
end

My Dark Heart

Although
my mind
is broken

And my
soul has
been torn
apart

Underneath
all the
sadness
I’m still

A hopeless
romantic
at heart

Nyctophilia

I’m
better
alone
than in
company

Just
like I’m
happier
in the
dark

That
way
I never
have to
see anyone

Or
hear
another
disparaging
remark

Regime #7

I think
these pills
have
stopped
working

They
have
become
just a
token

For
they no
longer
take away
the hurting

From a
heart
that is
already
broken

3.38pm

Another
day spent
lying
in bed

Thoughts
racing
through
my head

Wondering
what it
was you
said

And all
the while
wishing
I was dead

To The Minute

There’s nothing
else to do

There’s nothing
else to say

For my love was
lost to me forever

One year
ago today

Xxx

Rhubarb

Searching
for
light

Raised
in
darkness

Our
numbers
grow

Despite
the
sparseness

Achilles H(eel)

Lingering
on the
ocean floor

Lurking
in the
starkness

This is
where we
both belong

Hidden
amongst
the darkness

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