Daddy Issues

Now I know

Why you left

Time

And time again

It wasn’t because

I wasn’t enough

You just couldn’t

Stand the pain

01/05/2025 4

Meeting As Kids

So what is it

You’re saying?

He said

You want to pack up

And get rid?

It’s not that I don’t

Love you now

She said

It’s that I’m not sure

I ever did

31/01/2024 4

Marriage

What a ridiculous way

To spend a day

Let alone

A lifetime

16/12/2023 10

What It Is

So tell me exactly
What it is
That she doesn’t understand
How you justify
Your roving eye
And your wandering hand

And I’ll tell you exactly
What it is
That really grinds my gears
How you can sit there
Without a care
Whilst she’s at home in tears

04/08/2023 4

My Heart Was Never In It

When we stood

Up there that day

And promised

We’d always be true

It seems all I proved

As our marriage concludes

Is that I’m a better liar

Than you

18/07/2023 10

The Ballad Of Boxing Day

Is that it now

He said

Have the bells rung out?

As I cannot eat

Another sprout

Oh shut your face

She said

All you’ve done is moan

You’ll be spending next year

On your own

(Originally Posted 26.12.2020)

26/12/2022 0

Trouble And Strife

I will quite happily sit here

Enjoying all this food and wine

But you should remember

That come next November

The last laugh will be mine

A Waste Of Money

Dearly
beloved

We
are
gathered
here
today

To
witness
this
couple’s
happiness

We
must
remember,
of course,

That
in a
year
they’ll
divorce

And
we’ll
have
forgotten
all of this
sappiness

(Originally Posted 16.10.2020)

16/10/2022 2

42%

I can clearly remember

Their wedding day

All of that promise

On display

It’s such a shame

It ended that way

And now love’s young dream

Has faded away

The(ir) Split

It’s
not
about
what
she
did

Or
what
he did
either
to be
fair

It’s
about
how
it has
made
me feel

As for
the
rest
I could
not
care

(Originally Posted 16.09.2020)

16/09/2022 2

A Common Law Wife

For someone who never married

He said

You write about it often enough

Perhaps I was wrong all those years

She said

His proposals to rebuff

The Disengagement Party

I saw you looking

Over dinner

Your smile discreet

Hers a winner

I realised there

Was something more

When she sashayed

To the dance floor

I knew it then

In revelatory style

It was obvious we’d never

Walk down the ailse

(Originally Posted 17.08.2020)

17/08/2022 11

Mediocre

If only she was better

Then she’d be worthy of your hand

But as it is

It’s a basic bitch

Who will wear your wedding band

02/01/2022 20

Another Business Trip

By chance

I met

Your wife today

And she seems

Really nice

If only

She knew

What I do

Her smile

Would turn to ice

08/11/2021 30

Torn Asunder

We always knew

This would end one day

That all our feelings

Would fade away

But we didn’t know

How much it would hurt

That we couldn’t see it through

For better or worse

28/09/2021 20

#4 The Bigamist

I’ll love you forever and ever

Until we’re both cold and blue

Just don’t worry

Your pretty little head

With who else I’ve said this to

31/08/2021 22

Not Her, You

You can tell me you don’t think she’s pretty

And that there’s nothing more to say

But I’ve been here before

And can spot a whore

From a thousand miles away

12/04/2021 24

Discord

At some point you have to see

He said

It was you who wouldn’t commit

I wasn’t the one who gave up

She said

I just ended it

12/04/2021 14

Another Please, Barkeep (Part 2)

I 
think 
you 
might 
expire

He 
said

If 
your 
sigh 
gets 
any 
heavier 

Well, 
I guess 
I'd be 
better 
off 

She 
said 

Now 
he's 
agreed 
to marry 
her

28/01/2021 17

Wars Of Attrition

Some people stay together

And hate every second of it

But as they’re bound by tradition

They put up with each others shit

They’re worn down day after day

But are far too scared to leave

For of a life full of happiness

They cannot possibly conceive

06/01/2021 26

A Waste Of Money

Dearly
beloved

We
are
gathered
here
today

To
witness
this
couple’s
happiness

We
must
remember,
of course,

That
in a
year
they’ll be
divorced

And
we’ll
have
forgotten
all this
sappiness

16/10/2020 27

Cited

From
everyone else

At the
time

I picked
you out

To be
mine

To love,
honour

And
obey

And
I did

Until
you

Walked
away

24/09/2020 6

Magnets

What
holds us
together

Is a
deep
connection

That
need
never

Be
in
question

But
whether
or not

It’s
love
or hate

Is very
much
still

Up
for
debate